Am feeling very low - handhold needed

[Carlotta2019]

I’m 32. I’m very depressed at the moment. I’ve had decades of unhappiness and I’m seriously considering ending things. It is the only thing giving me something to keep going at the moment. I don’t want to stay alive anymore and I don’t want to keep doing this. I don’t know why I’m posting apart from that I’m also too cowardly to go through with anything. But I do feel so exhausted. I want to go somewhere and be sedated for months, somewhere I can just sleep and sleep and not be aware of anything.

Huge hug. You are not alone. Do you have anyone in real life you can speak to?

Hi ! I didn't want to read and run. Please phone the samaritans . They will
Help you if you're feeling like this. Please know that you are important. What can't you do anymore ? If you could wave a magic wand what would you like to happen in your life?

Please call this number - 116 123 - it's for the Samaritans. They will help you. The call won't appear on your phone bill.

Oh, and most importantly...
You are important and
You do matter.

Hi Carlotta2019,

We're really sorry to hear you're feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources. You can also go to the Samaritans website or email them on [email protected] or call them on 116 123, any time.

Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek real life help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

We're going to move this thread to the Mental Health section shortly.

Sending good wishes

I’m sorry. I feel so unhappy and I’ve fekt like this for so long I can’t see how it will improve. I don’t have any dependents and no one is relying on me for anything. If I go, no one else’s life will really be impacted. I’ve failed at so much and I feel so hopeless. I had a relationship fail recently and a long term one before that. I don’t have any family and I’m not even working at the moment as I’m freelance and work has been scarce. I’ve lost all enthusiasm for anything but this has been going on for years. Only one person knows how I’ve felt all this time. No one can help me as it’s just how I feel and life circumstances and but I’ve lost all my fight to make things better for myself. I just want to sleep now for a very long time.

I feel very unloveable and very alone. I’m frightened of the future and how I will get through it. I don’t want to try anymore to live.

posting here makes me think that you're looking for a reason to live.

You can do this, you can feel better, you can have better tomorrows.

I have been where you are now and I wouldn't have believed how my life would be now, then.

Please ring someone. Are you on your own at the moment?

I’ve lost all my fight to make things better for myself

let someone else fight for you then - please please please speak to someone.

Hi. I want you to know you are important and special. These years have taken their toll but you are asking for help and that's so important. Well done.

We all have times when things seem super bad and worthless. You are worth a lot to yourself and to others.

Do you have any siblings? Or parents?

Sorry. I just re-read your post. You don't have any family.

Are you in England?

Do you enjoy walking? What part of the country are you in?

Parkrun is free and there is one near everyone. I am a huge fan of parkrun. Google it and go and watch your local parkrun. You don;t need to take part. If you feel self conscious wear headphones and anyone will think you're listening to music. There is a fee-good atmosphere and getting out on a Saturday morning just might help. It helped me.I was starting to get stuck indoors taking forever to get any tasks done and feeling sorry for what I didn't have. I started parkrun a year ago and can honestly say it improved my mental health. You can volunteer with the setting up, marshalling the course and you can help with the barcode scanning.

What part of the country are you in? Are there any National Trust houses/gardens near you? Do you like taking photos? someone told me to get out and take photos or anything that made me smile. It could be a tree/clouds/river/animals etc.

Oh lovely. You are important and you matter. Life can and WILL get better. Keep talking to us. Big hugs.

How are you feeling? I hope you are hanging in there and hopefully even feeling a bit better