Am I just being mean or is it deeper than that??

[Pinklady1982]

Since my father passed away last year I've been finding myself getting very irritated with other people very easily, like if they complain about something or are ill, I just don't seem to have any sympathy. I've only really realised this recently as I heard the way I spoke to my poor little girl (5) and realised this isn't the first time I've got annoyed about a complaint with a little pain in her leg. Problem is its always at bedtime so I get cross thinking it's an excuse. Of course when she really hurt herself I was devastated and did everything that one does to help their child, but I just can't bear hearing anyone keep going on and on and on all the blummin time!! I think my oh is partly to blame for this as he keeps banging on all day long if something is wrong with him, but I never used to be this unsympathetic. I don't know what has changed so much inside me to make me feel this way. Am i normal to be feeling like this? Guess I just don't know where to turn to really.

Bereavement does make big changes in your life - I didn't have this particular symptom but physically I felt awful. Eventually I saw the GP and he referred me to bereavement counselling which I found very helpful.

Generally I do find when it's the loss of a parent people do seem to expect you to "get over it" quite quickly - I know I wanted to talk about it much more than people wanted to listen - that's probably why counselling was really useful - someone was actually being paid to listen.

Thanks for taking the time to reply to me. I have seen a gp and on some meds. They have said to get counciling, I just can't bring myself to do it. I'm worried it's going to make me worse, but you're right, people have expected me to just get on with it and with having a young child there hasn't really been much choice. It will be a year next week and just don't know how to cope. I've felt like I've lost so much over this past year, friends included. The 2 friends closest to me have both lost parents so thought they would be there for me, but if anything the have been more distant.

Well, it sounds like your DD was potentially playing for time. Sometimes theybdo, and being slightly disengaged is the right thing to do.
The moany partner.... understandable why you arent overflowing with sympthy. Some people are sympathy sponges and will seek and suck up as much as they can get ....