Left work "ill" because I'm emotionally and mentally drained but feel guilty.

[Butterdream]

I have just done this and feel a bit wrong for doing it.

Going through problems with my child's nursery and haven't yet been able to find a new one that I trust. I work 1 hour away from the nursery and have felt so anxious about leaving her.

DH is ridiculously busy at work and all of the meetings,emails, phone conversations, new nursery visits are being done by myself. He doesn't even seem to have time to discuss anything on an evening as he's so busy.

My other DC is on the go all the time, never stops, never stops talking so I've no time or space to think at home.

Having serious marriage problems.

Struggling to sleep.

Not had a break in God knows how long.

So tired.

My anxiety is through the roof and I keep worrying I'm going to have a heart attack.

Driving whilst tired is bothering me and I have a 2 hour commute each day.

I have a list of medical appointments I need to attend and book, my washing baskets are over-flowing, my house is untidy.

All I've wanted to do today is come home, tidy up, do some washing and collect my child early from nursery, this is ok, isn't it?

Give yourself a break, before it becomes a breakdown.

I would urge you to speak to your GP, you have mentioned anxiety problems and sleepless nights, and inability to perform at work. You may wish to discuss being signed off for a short period of time, so that you can get your mental health back up to par. It’s as important as physical health, if not more so, so please don’t ignore it or minimise it until it becomes an insurmountable problem.

Hugs to you from a fellow sufferer of overload x

I took a half days holiday yesterday because I was feeling anxious, upset and very tired. My boss is great so I just told her i was feeling rubbish and not snapping out of it and she just said to use a half days holiday if I needed to. Feel loads better today but i know the whole week would have been a write off if I hadn't taken the time.

Thankyou for the reassurance.

I don't think it helps that DH seems to overload himself (and me as a domino effect) so I feel I'm carrying more load than I have put on myself.

I wish I didn't suffer from this overwhelm and want to be a more present mother but find my mind flitting around all the time.

Don't feel bad. You are not well, you need to take the time. When I'm having a patch of poor sleep I will take a day off work to rebalance and not feel guilty, because I'm getting unwell because of it.

Have you talked to your oh about how you are feeling?

Thankyou @Echobelly. Glad I'm not alone in doing this.
OH isn't too bothered I don't think. He has so much on himself, I think he sees me as a bit of a wimp for not coping better

This was me two days ago - I only left work an hour or so early but I couldn't bear to be there a moment longer. Also recognise the feeling of exhaustion and overwhelm. I've been on antidepressants since December but wondering if I should be going back to the gp for another review as things seem to be slipping back again.

I've started to realise that you can't just keep on keeping on because eventually something just snaps. I think you did the right thing. I'm actually wondering whether I should get myself signed off for a couple of weeks to give myself some recovery time.

I hope you feel a bit better for having those few hours. It does make a difference.

Look after yourself. You sound like me and I kept going and ended up physically ill and needed a break. Luckily I was able to take some time off and it’s made a great difference.

It’s easy for your dh to cope because it sounds like he’s only got work to worry about!!!!

Chill matey, it’s called a Mental Health day and we all take them.
Hope you feel better and get some peace this weekend.