schema therapy or psychoanalysis?

[insightopedia]

Has schema therapy helped you in changing life long patterns? How long it took?
I wrote a few times before.
I have c-ptsd with OCD, have a very dysfunctional family.
I have tried a few therapists, didn't like any. I know I am the common denominator, so I seem to be the issue.
Before, I didn't hear about c-ptsd and tried therapy for depression, etc.
Now I found a private therapist who uses CAT (cognitive analytical therapy) which is basically analysing past, relationship patterns.
I had 4 sessions and felt terrible after each as we discussed past. I told her I am very depressed and first need help with present but she says without awareness, you can't solve anything.
I am very aware of patterns through past therapies, researching and introspection. Now I am completely isolated, no job but she wants to talk about my childhood. Also sometimes she needs me to give her examples if I give a high level opinion of my relationship with a family member. It makes me feel she doesn't trust my judgement. I feel frustrated giving examples to give evidence of how I think I was treated by a person.
I leave therapy with worse mood to apply for jobs, which is itself very difficult as I have a long gap now.

She now says she would be okay if I want to try another therapy mode which is more present / solution based.

I had seen another therapist 2 years ago (7 sessions), who uses multiple therapy modes including schema.
Reason I stopped going to him was he was a little pushy. Used to make my daily schedules, insists me to take supermarket cashier roles when I have very advanced educational qualifications and can still do complex business/financial analysis despite massive gap. I just need some help with confidence and motivation for job search and preparation.
I got frustrated as therapist kept repeating I should take a role of a receptionist or in supermarket, etc. I don't look down upon these roles but they will never lead me to the kind of work I was doing before (multinational firm Sr. project manager).
Otherwise he was nice and accommodating. I am very tempted to go back to him as he does schema therapy. He has offered to give me some discount on his fees.
So my question is should I continue with the lady with CAT or the male therapist who also does schema?
I feel I have deep rooted issues but I also need help with present to make changes.
CAT is mostly for interpersonal patterns and SCHEMA covers interpersonal and other self sabotaging life traps.
Both therapists have pros and cons. I am tired of looking for therapists so wouldn't like to search for any other.
thank you

It sounds like to me you haven't met the right therapist. I honestly feel you have to keep looking until you find the Prince so to speak.

I have been accessing therapy for 9 months now and have found that sometimes it's difficult afterwards. I am not sure about the different treatments you have discussed but, I am guessing with a CPTSD diagnosis there is a trauma there.

This is not something you can rush into discussing with someone, my T says that there are three stages of recovery I can't remember the exact names though. I am in the safety stage and that could take forever to move to dealing with the problem.

My instinct would be to say don't go for either, as the male one sounds incredibly pushy and the female on sounds like you don't gel with her. However, that's not the answer your looking for so I would say go with the female therapist.

I’m currently doing cat therapy

I’ve suffered from anxiety leading to depression on a few occasions.
I suffered in/off for 35 yrs, I’m now 61

It’s very hard going into your past,as it’s a reminder of what things were like. It took 4/5 sessions to go through that. I cried numerous times. Often came home feeling worse than when I went
I asked numerous times, what as the past got to do with what’s happening to me now.
He said, most of what happened in our past as an effect on how we are today.
I’m now at the point where we have do a thing called mapping
It’s the way I think, when you actually see it mapped out in front off you, you can see where your thinking gets out of control

We are working on 3 things, that have a bad affect on me and everyday life.
This is where I’m upto at the moment

It’s been very hard, and made me feel like shit at times
Why I’m I like this, why can’t I be normal, I have been truly honest with what I’ve told him, otherwise it will be a waste
I don’t know if it will work! Even if I get something out of it that makes an improvement in the way I think differently I’ll be happy with that

Just re read and I didn’t answer your question

Personally I wouldn’t go back to either.
They don’t sound suitable

They shouldn’t be pushy, pushing you into situations your not comfortable doing at the moment
You should be able to feel
Relaxed, calm, comfortable to discuss things that distress and bother you without judgement
It’s hard to find a good therapist, I’ve had quite a few I’ve not felt comfortable with.
Google schema/cat therapy in your area
There must be more than 2
If there good they should offer a 20 min free chat
It can be very frustrating finding a therapist, which is very hard
Don’t waste anymore money in these to people

Thank you both for your replies.
darkriver and grandagitl I have tried at least 5 more in past - with 2 only one session to understand. Also talked to several on phones.
Problem is there is no perfect therapist. Many of them think they know better than their clients/ patients.
I spoke to someone specialising in Cptsd on phone and he didn’t sound warm or gentle. I saw another therapist for 3 sessions. She specialises in trauma with years of experience. One would think she would be warm and gentle. She was not. Also it takes you a few session to get the real picture.

It’s waste of a lot of money for someone not working for a long time.

I wonder if I learnt what I needed to learn from therapy ( I read a lot of books too) and now I have to be in charge of change in my life as these therapist are v indifferent to progress their clients are making. They get their fees, so where is the pressure.
Meanwhile client is going in detail about past week by week but not making any changes to her current life.

I have no social support- no friends, indifferent family, no job. Dh works long hours and travels and also had his own issues.
So after a session I come back to home sit on sofa and let the day go by. I breed a lot about past or how I should’ve dealt with the person in that situation. To change my mood, I go on internet, watch tv, go for walks, etc. What’s the point of session if this is how you spend rest of day. My therapist ( lady) didn’t even ask how I spend my day. Sometimes look for jobs, but for a person with a long break, I need to do more than simply apply. I was told by a recruiter recently for a very junior level role 400 people applied, no I wonder I never get interviews. Plus with my depression, low energy, I can’t really do well in interviews.

I would much rather spend this time to be doing productive things like learning new skills but I need to be out of depression.

I read great reviews about CAT, so chose her. I get a sense CAT is only for interpersonal relationships, moods, it doesn’t deal with other patterns.

Schema on paper sounds very good. I read the book, I have at least 9 schemas out of 12. But the last therapist was pushy.

I don’t think keep looking will help. I had spent 8 months in searching before I met this lady. I know most profiles on counselling directory and on other similar sites.

I feel I need to do more work to get something out of therapy. I will be more assertive with therapist if he is pushy. Though therapists get defended when you give a negative feedback. In my experience all did.
I am told I need a lot of sessions. I have insurance which will pay for some and for rest I will pay myself.
So I can’t find a therapist who doesn’t have contract with insurance company.
Sorry my post is quite confused. It’s because i am so tired and a bit hopeless about therapy.

I have spent a lot of time in therapy if i combines past therapist which led me to do a lot of reflection on myself, my relationships, etc.

Perhaps you should put therapy on the back burner for a while?
Concentrate on you?

I’ve suffered depression my times in my life unfortunately, you can’t rush depression it will lift when it’s ready

Have you tried mindfulness, be in the here and now

Do you take any medication to see if it helps

Thanks grandagirl

I know I am frustrated and have learnt a lot about myself. I still need some help with change self sabotaging patterns.

Do you think CAT helps in changing those patterns/ snags?

So, first 4-5 sessions are to understand issues/patterns?

After that, were you asked to do exercises to change those patterns?

E.g. Let's say you learnt in 1st 4 sessions, that all your life you have been a perfectionist as grew up with very critical family and now you give up after a while if things are not going to perfect standards.
Or you care a lot about how others think of you and have self-esteem issues.

From 5th sessions onward, are you made to do some exercises to break that pattern?
I have awareness of my patterns, I can't seem to change them on my own.
How many sessions have you had? Do you think you made some progress in terms of changes?

thanks a lot for reading my super long posts and responding :-)

I get CAT through nhs, have you tried self referring ?
I’m supposed to have 20-24 sessions
The guy I see is really good, and I gel with him
As I’ve said I’ve had numerous therapy over the years but have always had recurrent episodes few years later.
It’s very very hard to break learnt behaviour patterns, ie thinking, thoughts
The way we have that critical inner voice chatting in the background
fear is usually at the root of what holds us back—fear of the unknown or unfamiliar. To face our fears, we must consciously identify and actively ignore this voice.

The first few sessions are going back to your childhood,
Family brothers sisters, school, work, relationships , friends etc etc

Then after that you get a letter from your therapist, in that he wrote 3 things down that he thought I need to work on . This isn’t set in stone and can be changed.

After that comes the mapping out of your thoughts/thinking of areas of concern

I’m at this point now
I’ve had 10 sessions I think,
I haven’t seen any dramatic changes, but I do tend to not be too hard on myself in the way I talk to myself
Ie if I find I’m talking myself out of going somewhere, I’ll have an angry inner voice saying
“ oh just do it’. Instead of
“ ok this might be hard, but you can do it”
He’s also ask me to listen to self kindness meditation, as he thinks I’m too hard and critical on myself
Perfectionism comes into that.

He as told me that he will be asking me to do things out of my comfort zone and we may have some conflict there!!
But time will tell, as it’s still early days yet.

Thank you for your response granadagirl

I didn't get it through NHS. I was told there is a very long waiting.

Hi @Insight I had experience with Schema and I wouldn't do it again for all the money in the world. I think it can actually be quite damaging for c-ptsd. When there's trauma involved who wants to sit there and be told how defective they are?

CAT is supposed to be excellent but as PP said you're looking at 20+ sessions to start to get to grips with things. Are you expecting too much too quickly?

I'm having EMDR which is hands down the best therapy I've tried but it doesn't work for every situation - might be worth trying, but I will warn you, like CAT it takes a while before you start getting to the centre of the problem. (I've had more than 30 sessions so far and haven't covered everything but it has had a huge impact.)

Thanks for your post PhoenixMama.

Did you get your sessions through NHS?

I am about to start schema. I read a lot of positive reviews online.

Do you mind if I ask you about how schema therapy is carried out? What happens in sessions and what are you supposed to do in between sessions?

I had seen a CAT therapist for 3 sessions and found therapist to be very rigid. One time I almost had a panic attack in the session about recent problems, as a reaction she walked to the drawing board to draw some diagrams of CAT patterns rather than offer any comfort.