Feeling alone

[TheOrigBrave]

Just need some company and kind words.

I need to cry, but I am at home and have tradesmen here.

I self-referred to MH team. They said they would call 'shortly'. They didn't. I saw GP (not specifically for this, but related), he then chased up referral as he was concerned.

They did call. They did assessment and I guess I did too well as they say I don't need secondary MH care, but instead have suggested I contact the team which is a DV support service.

They have a 6 month waiting list to see a counsellor, and having spoken to them it's more for people who are IN a DV situation, which I am not - I am out the otherwise and dealing with the aftermath.

I feel cast aside. The only support I have now is in the form of medication and the Samaritans. I don't want to just take meds.

I don't blame you for not wanting to just go down the road of medicine. I'm so sorry you're feeling so alone, very well done for reaching out on here.
Does your gp practice have a listening service? They're usually trained volunteers who will simply listen and give you space to be heard.
You also need to congratulate yourself on escaping DV, that's a huge achievement and you need support to stop you internalising the abuse.
You're not alone, though I know that you must feel it. Very well done for having come this far.

So sorry. I've been in similar situation and while difficult you will get through this.
Keep in contact with gp and keep on about the counselling. It is a long wait but at least you are on their radar and there is a chance you could be seen earlier. Does GP surgery have someone you could talk to in the meantime? I was offered 40 mins a fortnight with an in-house counsellor. It was really helpful. I can't really advise about meds as I refused to take them.

Thank you. Your kind words are bringing tears to my eyes and I just can't let go yet. I will come back later.

Once you hit rock bottom the only way is up

Take your time OP

It so awful that you aren't getting the help you need.

This will get better. You're clearly in a good enough mindset to seek help which is a great start.

Could you even pay for some counselling or CBT privately for now?

Thank you all again, you all helped.

I do feel a little better today, though was awake a fair bit in the night thinking about what I'll say to my GP next week. I don't know whether to keep trying to access help, or just get my shit together and try and shut off the intrusive thoughts.

I will ask him about a local listening service, that might be very useful. Often I don't need solutions, just to vent and learn to deal with my emotions.

To be fair I have had a great deal of support already - I was under the care of the Eating Disorder service for 2 years, and that came with psychological support. It finished in Jan (a joint decision) but I have since felt cast adrift.

I am still trying to find some ongoing support.
I've been bounced about the Access and Assessment team.
The psychologist said she would provide support for me while I was waiting for something outside of their team (what, I don't know), but having sent me an appt for a date I said I was away I am now waiting for another one. She said she would send me an appointment letter at the end of Aug, but I haven't received anything yet.

I could phone but I just feel like I'm bugging them; the service is obviously stretched.

Meds have been put on repeat so I don't see my GP every fortnight.

I am basically left struggling with my ED and MH with just meds, which is the last thing I ever wanted. I'm OK taking meds along side other support.