One of of best school friends of c. 30 years ( we are late 40’s) , we used to see lots of each other. She’s had a tough old time of life, couple of abusive husbands, 4 kids, losing parents suddenly and close together. After remarrying a few years ago, she seemed great. Husband lovely, new baby etc etc.
We saw less of her, but she seemed ok however it now appears that she has been masking a severe anxiety , mental health issue which she has been medicating with drink and meds. I did think she was avoiding contact and her DH seemed less than thrilled when myself and our other BF visited and also that she didn’t look well. But I put it down to us not getting any younger, kids, work etc etc.
The issue has now escalated and she is now very unwell , we literally only became aware this week when he sister contacted me. She is making some unwise and dangerous choices and I’m terribly worried. I will now be maintaining contact and have said I’ll do anything I can to help. I’ve contacted her husband and said I’ll do anything to help him too and that it can’t be easy for him, but the thing I can’t work out is whether her behaviour has made him controlling ( I’ve heard things from her and the kids that make me worried) or has he simply become controlling because of how she’s been behaving IYSWIM. I’m desperately worried that something terrible is going to happen but worried I’ve made things worse by contacting him. Her sisters are involved but frankly rather ineffectual.
It doesn’t help that she’s clearly not functioning well and therefore not fully coherent. And she’s still holding down a senior level job as well. The GP has put her on a reducing alcohol programme with supplementary meds’ to counteract the effects, but she isn’t sticking to it. She was so upset and beat down today, it’s heartbreaking to see.Any advice from you all would be really valued , I can hardly sleep for the worry. We are as close as sisters and I just want to help her get well, which is what I told her today.