Depression has hit me. Again.

[Lily715]

I've had depression and anxiety for around ten years.

Had a mental health break down last summer resulting in an emergency trip to A&E and two months off work.

Now on sertraline and despite awful side effects (numbness, no sex drive, mood swings, the list goes on) was feeling a lot better.

But over the last two weeks things seem to have just broken down. I feel awful about myself. I wish I was a better person.

I feel like there's no point to life, I feel as if I'm just existing and I don't care about anything.

I feel so lonely.

I'm posting on here because I don't know who to talk to. My relationship feels dead at the moment, it's probably over tbh but neither of us want to admit it.

Sorry things aren’t going well.
Do you have any children?
When is your next appointment?

No children. I would like to have my first, maybe next year but not with him.

I haven't seen the psychiatrist this year at all, I had to reschedule because work didn't give me the time off to go and now my next appointment is when I'm away. Whenever you have to reschedule its about six months until you get a new appointment. I know if I go back to my GP they will recommend counselling which I've had tons of and has never really worked for me.

Have you talked with your partner about your depression or your relationship?
Counseling can help you explore your thoughts and give you some tools to cope, but it won’t magically fix depression.
If you need a medication adjustment now, where can you go?
Two weeks into this and you are actively seeking help!