Depersonalisation-Derealisation disorder

[eae123]

My boyfriend has been suffering from depersonalisation disorder for the last 3 years and recently things have taken a nose dive. He is really struggling and I’m not sure what I can do to support it. He tells me how he feels but I obviously can’t relate (feels like he isn’t in his own body if that makes sense). I’ve found a clinic in London but it’s the only one in the country and I’m not sure of his chances of being referred despite diagnosis. Any help would be appreciated

Hi eae123. I have a different diagnosis, but experience a lot of derealisation and depersonalisation as part of my symptoms. It is a really difficult experience to explain to someone else, but can be very disorientating and leaves me feeling very detached.

Presumably if he has a diagnosis, he is seeing a psychiatrist. What support are they offering? Is he taking any medication or having any therapy?

Often depersonalisation and derealisation are linked to anxiety and stress (I see mine as a coping mechanism, when the world gets too stressful my brain just cuts it off a bit, but others might see their differantly). It's worth having a think about what might be triggering it for him so he can find treatment that will help. I found therapy that helped deal with my anxiety helped with my dp/dr as well, CBT was useful and I am now seeing a pychotherapist who is awesome and helping a lot.

Hi @PowerBadgers thank you so much for getting in touch!

Boyfriend does has a diagnosis but he hasn't seen a therapist, out of personal choice and wanting to try and manage himself. However, he has agreed to go see one so we will start that process soon.

He's taken the medication before but he suffers majorly with the side effects and there's no medication for his diagnosis specifically. Things have just reached a head for him and he is really struggling- its horrible to watch because you are right, it is difficult to relate to.

He's also bought a journal to write/draw triggers down as and when he comes across it but the feeling has been pretty consistent for three years now, hopefully we're beginning to work out how to manage it. I'm feeling more positive about it then a couple of days ago.

I once rang that clinic for advice for a young person, they were helpful. I think he probably needs to drive this though, and try treatment or actively seek a referral. And its not a familiar diagnosis to many clinicians.

That's the issue, the GP's aren't really aware despite all the paperwork. He rung the clinic today and they advised him on how to get a referral, as well as emailing a statement about the condition specifically to show to GP's. The waiting list is 8 months long but getting on it is better than nothing. We're both just out of uni as well so he struggled through Uni as they didn't really understand the condition which I think has made him feel discouraged. He does seem more positive tonight though so hopefully this is the start of a slow journey to help!

It sounds like he is starting to do some good things. Starting some therapy and looking at his triggers is a great step while he tries to get a referral through for the clinic.

It is true that this is a relatively new diagnosis I believe and a lot of professionals don't really know about it or understand how intense it can be. I ended up having an episode of psychosis so my own formulation is stress induced psychosis depite the fact I've had dr/dp since my childhood. So it really is good that he has managed to get the right diagnosis for him and can use that to get the help he needs.

I'm glad you are both feeling more positive and have started the journey. It really can get better with support, work and time, though it's still very much an ongoing project for me as well. :)