I think I have bipolar

[RhubarbCrumbled]

How should I talk to the GP about it?
The reason I think this is because I'm in the pit of another episode of depression where I'm crying lots, having pretend arguments (that actually come out of my mouth sometimes), many anxious and horrible thoughts about myself and I haven't slept properly for almost a month (from 0-4 hours a night). I'm just so very tired and can't concentrate and have so much that I need to do. All I've said for the last couple of months is 'I'm ok, I'm just ready for the holiday' which is in 2 weeks. I've had depressive episodes on and off since my late teens and have taken various medications for varying amounts of time.

However, I've also recently recognised that I have states where I'm very up, like I can achieve anything and put lots of plans in place. Spend lots of money (lots of debt to sort out in the past and just about dealing with the debt right now) and start lots of projects, weight loss, exercise. Last year I had 6 holidays, 3 to the USA. That's not normal, is it? And risky behaviour that I've only just realised was risky even though people pointed this out at the time. My DP loves me when I'm like this because I'm so upbeat and love to experiment sexually. We do some very exciting things together. Except then I crash.
I do have normal times, but it's starting to feel like I swing from one to the other and I want more normal. What I'd like is the normal with libido but not the risky stuff if that's possible!!

Anyway, how do I bring this up with the GP? I'm going to go tomorrow morning while I have the nerve to discuss it. What if he just thinks it's depression again? The antidepressants do something, but they really just make me flat and then I 'wake up' when I come off them. I've taken citalopram and sertraline. I've also read that it's not good to just take ADs on their own? If I can get him to at least talk to me about this then I can cope with the depression without the ADs for now. I just need to know what to expect and how to bring it up and anything I should ask for.

I just need help really.

I've also read that it's not good to just take ADs on their own?

How do you mean? Its good to have structure and also therapy alongside can help.I am bit like this - currently in low and determined when I get out of the debt not to derail everything! Fyi you can put temporary notes on your credit file to ask agencies to refuse credit. Are you with step change or anything?

I would just make a list of the symptoms and how they affect you - health, debt, relationships etc etc. I guess options would be therapy, different medications, a referral to a psychologist (no idea how likely sorry). It may be 'try and see' but I think its really important you have the conversation as its clearly affecting you. Good luck

You have to be really careful with AD’s if you do have bipolar as you can risk the likelihood of spiking into hypomania/mania without a mood stabiliser.

Before I was diagnosed, (originally diagnosed with depression and anxiety), I was put on an AD and I went loopy. Sent me hypomanic.

If you’re concerned, first step is to make an appointment with your gp, who can make a referral to a psychiatrist. Only a psychiatrist can diagnose.

Hope you’re ok, sounds like you’ve had a tough time

I have bipolar type 2 and your behaviour sounds a lot like mine.

Re: anti depressants- I tried them twice when I was younger and became very unwell quite quickly (suicidal obsessive thoughts, heading voices etc). Those symptoms stopped within days of stopping the medication.

When I was diagnosed, about 18 months ago (I went privately after a sudden and severe depressive episode), my psychiatrist told me that reaction to SSRI antidepressants is coming when someone with bipolar is misdiagnosed as having unipolar depression.

I was SO against medication for a long time, but I now take lamotrigine, which has treated the depression pretty well. I still get hypomanic sometimes though, and have now realised that I spent quite a lot of my life that way before, without realising it. I thought I was just impulsive

I have emergency meds for going too “high” - although my partner had to push me to take them last time, as I thought I was just in a good mood (whilst dashing around everywhere, spending money like water and booking a holiday)

So, the crash did come after that. I use a free mood chart app on my phone - that really helps to see what is going on, and I used that a lot while stabilising on the medication. Good luck.

Also, have you looked up the symptoms of adult ADHD? They are very similar to bipolar 2 - as untreated ADHD can lead to depression and also to impulsive obsessive phases.

*is common