Phone calls and emails are being rebuffed, stiffly and politely, and I get the distinct feeling I'm being "grey rocked". The same is happening with all our mutual friends.
We all feel that she's severely depressed, but have no idea if she's receiving treatment or has even been diagnosed. Life hasn't been kind to her and medical health issues mean that, at 50, she is still living with her parents and has no career or job, no family of her own, no partner, no real independence (and now needs physical support and care) and survives on the basic incapacity benefit or whatever has replaced it.
We used to meet up every so often in a certain cafe in town, but it had to be when it suited her, which meant it was always on a week day, and around 11am. We all work, so it meant the three of us in the group had to use holidays or rearrange our lives. Every so often she'd do a Saturday but two out of the three of us just cannot do that, what with families and schedules of our own. We invite her to girls nights in at home, to meals out, to catch up in quiet pubs (all with lifts, door to door, offered) and she refuses everything. Then she gets angry because we still went ahead and did it without her.
I'm at a loss here. She won't answer her landline (she has no mobile), and emails are met with a grey rock answer (I'm afraid I won't be able to meet up for the forseeable future due to prior committments). Maybe I should just give up....