I’m sorry, I realise that this may be in the wrong place but I really wasn’t sure where to put it. I was raped 15 years ago (February 2004) when I was 14 and as a result of this my mental health has never been great ever since. The man who raped me died last year and I initially thought that it would bring me closure and allow me to move on but if anything it’s made things worse. I think about him all the time and still have nightmares about it. I have had so much therapy throughout the years and have taken so many antidepressants and sleeping tablets over the years as well as an antipsychotic drug last year. Nothing has helped me to move on. I have only had one long term relationship and even then I didn’t have sex until 3 years into it and I often went through periods where I cried constantly about it. I tried to report it soon after it happened to my school but I went to a very rural school and it was all a bit brushed under the carpet. I genuinely don’t know if I’ll ever be able to move on. I also have special needs (and was diagnosed with bipolar last year but that has been overturned by another psychiatrist) and the doctors that I’ve told have said it will make it much harder for me to process what has happened. Every time I look at a photo in the last 15 years of when I was happy I always think to myself that it’s in the background and even when I’ve been at my most happiest moments it’s still hung over me. Does anybody know how you move forward from this? Thank you x