A good friend knows I have struggled with my MH in the period following my very difficult divorce. I can have low mood, be touchy and also set myself very high standards.
So, I told her I should have deferred a post grad course I'm taking.
She said that there wouldn't have been any point in her saying that to me when I enrolled [the subtext being I'm bloody minded].
That annoyed me so I said that at the time I enrolled my personal circumstances were different.
She then came back and said she was just showing concern but she knows better than to voice it.
What is the point of telling me she doesn't/hasn't told me stuff because she knows I either won't listen or will get defensive (or whatever she thinks). Either tell me at the time or don't tell me at all.
This feels like a double blow: I didn't tell you at the time, and now I'm going to make you feel crap by telling you after the event.
Does that make any sense?
FWIW, have just upped my ADs and am in the 'worse before it gets better stage' so am proper grumpy.