I need some opinions on whether my life is crap or not

[meeshy]

Let me summarise where I am right now - I am a 40 year old mum of 3 great boys aged 6, 5 and 2. I am the quintessential busy working mum with a stressful job that needs me to travel extensively in the Uk and Europe often without much notice.

Trouble is, my husband has that sort of job too and consequently we spend all our time trying to sychronise diaries and failing, with me feeling like I am having to give excuses all the time for not coming to meetings when really it is because husband is in Madrid or wherever.

So we see little of each other in the week and every other weekend he is off to see his sick dad at the other end of the country. I feel like we can;t carry on as we are but not sure how to make it right. I really don't want to give my job up as I've worked really hard to get to where I am and all the other careers I've looked at don't stack up money wise, meaning you basically spend your salary on childcare.

Advice gratefully received !

[LeafTurner]

Well - why not have a word with some of the key carers at the nursery - when my dd was at nursery several parents had arrangements with one or two girls to provide emergency cover - they had keys to the house and if the mum and dad had to dash off they would take the kids home and put them to bed etc. They also used to babysit. And they would stay over. Of course you have to trust them and pay them - but that might work for you.

I find I have to be very very strict with my diary - I book out every Friday and everyone knows that I don't do meetings etc on Fridays - I do calls, but not meetings. I have to protect it!

[Flum]

yeah sounds a bit rubbish. most people have crazy busy lives these days. I spose if you could bring yourself to do it you could ask for a career break for a year, just to get your head back to gether and back on course

[meeshy]

I am definately going to talk to a girl at our nursery who babysits for us sometimes and who the kids love.

It could just be the lifeline I need in an emergency when both of us are away.

Reading your replies has made me realise that there are lots of options, not just jacking it all in but thinking a bit creatively about what the problems are and how to resolve.

Trouble is I find that we tend to spend our salaries and have a lifestyle of nice hols and stuff which is a hard habit to break !

[LeafTurner]

Excellent - so that's your first step. Then what about thinking about flexible working - maybe slightly reducing your hours - or even taking a career break.

Good Luck