I’ve never felt so alone

[charlottepickles]

I had some sort of breakdown in October last year where I landed up sitting in the middle of the gardens at university and had to be picked up by student security and given sedatives from the doctor .

Uni told me to take a year out of my course and come home to my mum .

I’ve been here four weeks now . I’ve never felt so unhappy and desperate and alone . I’ve been self harming daily , in ways that no one will notice , I’m self medicating and I can’t see a way to recover now . I’m on sertraline but it’s useless .

I phoned local GP and they said I’ve a six week wait to see a doctor .

Hi Charlotte, did you tell them that’s it’s urgent? Perhaps you could have had an appointment with the nurse instead. Is there a local walk in centre you could go to or phone to get some help as six weeks is ridiculous. Let us know how you get on x

Does the GP surgery offer on the day appointments or callbacks for emergencies? Look on their website, it may tell you what the procedure is.

How are you self medicating? I can understand the urge to numb your pain, but alcohol is a depressant, it will make things worse.

Codeine , I’m highly addicted . I don’t know how to stop .

Surgery did offer me an appointment with a nurse practitioner and I saw her a fortnight ago , but she just shrugged and said , take the sertraline and you will feel much better in two or three days . I’ve had depression since I was 17 and I’m now 28, I don’t imagine two days would make any difference .

I managed to find the courage to phone a helpline earlier though and she waanlovely lady , gave me the courage to ask surgery for a sooner appt with a doctor . Going to phone at 8am tomorrow .