I'm not sure if this is the right thread and I'll say up front it is a bit on the pathetic side so please be kind. Also bear with me because I don't want to ID but I also dont want to drip feed.
Yesterday a car slammed into the back of my stationary car and I am so upset by the stupid unsafe way I reacted.
We pulled over into a next door car park.
I wasn't injured and car apparently not bashed but could have unseen damage.
I politely asked for his details and he started shouting at me, yelling and prodding the bumper. So I took photos and tried to take a photo of his id badge after asking him politely and he agreed but when I looked later he'd covered up his name. Every time I asked for details(and I didn't argue or make a fuss either) he kept saying I don't want to get insurance involved and I said but its normal to exchange details, At this point a woman came up and said I am a witness I saw it all and I will give you my number. He that"We can solve this if the next door garage sees damage we can take it from there. its just there!!" I did say I don't want to go to a garage with you, i want to go to my garage and just exchange details."
He got even angrier kept shouting about the garage next door. Stupidly stupidly I agreed as for some daft reason I felt like I was in trouble!! and wouldn't get the details unless we went. It was As soon as we got hthere I rememberd of course. it had been closed for a year. So obvious I should add that I was quite shakey at this time and just didn't know what to do.
He then went on about going to another garage. I asked for details again but he said he was going to get a nearby garage to look at it jumped into his car shouting follow me. So like a complete idiot I did as I thought well the garage will back me up.
He drove off at speed through some back streets and then I thought I really really dont like this so I had to flash and beep and pull over about 4 times to get him to stop. We were in a deserted street. He came over and started shouting again about going to the garage et." Are you trying to make me lose my job. I've had no sleep.. etc.".. . i repeated that it was normal to just exchange details and I didn't want to go to his garage. What was the name of it. No answer.
He said "I've got an idea. I think you've been drinking, why don't I just calll the police and we'll get your blood tested." I said how dare you! you went into the back of me! I felt very unsafe then as he was much nastier here and overbearing than in the crowded car park and said I'm not going any garage with you. got back in my car and drove off as he was shouting
Anyway the point is..
I couldn't sleep a wink last night and kept bursting into tears. I feel really pathetic. Why was I so stupid? Why did I follow him out of the car park, which was such an unsafe thing to do. Why did I let him bully me like that. He was completely in the wrong yet I just caved and let him shout at me and browbeat me. I've been bullied a lot in the past and I thought I was grown up now and able to stand up for myself and more assertive these days (thanks to mumsnet and no is a complete sentance etc) but now I feel like I've made no progress at all... I can't stop thinking what is it about me that makes people behave like that. Am I sending out a signal that people think they can bully me like this.
I recognise this is pathetic.. and I don't know why I'm so upset. and useless. I just want to find a way to help myself not cave like this under pressure.