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I can’t handle criticism

2 replies

Confused1012 · 06/03/2019 20:44

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to post this & I know it’s a bit of a strange one.

Bit of background:
I used to be really happy, easy going & outgoing. Then from a really young age I got into a really controlling and awful relationship which lasted nearly a decade where he would criticise & control everything I did, ate, wore, who I spoke to, how I spoke to them. It got to the point where I would take hours to write a text message to a friend, because I’d internalised the criticism so much, I could never get anything ‘right’. I left that relationship, but only found myself in a similar relationship with someone who doesn’t control me, but will find things to criticise about me constantly, inc personal things that are usually ‘out of bounds’ for normal relationships. There won’t just be 1 criticism either, he’ll run off a list of all my flaws from time to time.
It’s gotten to the point where I just can’t handle criticism from anyone, any perceived criticism (even if not intended) just makes me cry/become defensive. I don’t like the person I’ve become. I’m so hard on myself all the time. I know I need to start counselling but just wondered if anyone else has been through similar? Or has any tips?

OP posts:
noego · 06/03/2019 22:35

It is not insult from another that causes you pain. It is the part of the mind that agrees with the insult. Agree only with the truth about you and you are free.

MapleAndCats · 09/03/2019 04:00

This is something you can work through with a psychotherapist. I have gone through this and am going through it for the identical reasons and it’s part of trauma recovery and coping with anxiety and low self esteem.
Good luck.

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