Not wanting to be social or meet with friends...does anyone else have this?

[StarlightIntheNight]

I have always been more of the home type. I prefer to stay home and watch a movie or be with my family then meet up with friends. I do force myself to meet with friends once in a while, as I do not want to be a recluse. I do like my friends, but for some reason I just never want to go out. I know I am very lucky to have friends that want to meet up, but I always find myself trying to space them out further or push it back etc. A friend just invited me for drinks next week, to which I said yes, but then looked at my calendar and realised I have plans to meet 3 other friends that week (different days and one earlier in the day of the drinks plan for coffee) and instead of feeling excited, I kind of felt like oh man....like I know myself I will want to cancel. And most of the time I do cancel on my poor friends...especially for evening plans. I am more likely to go if its during the day. Is this a sign of depression? Or maybe I am just a recluse? Why am I like this?

You’re hardly a recluse if you’re going to meet with three friends in a week.
If you’ve always been like that then it’s just your personality.

Does it bother you?

I am not usually meeting 3 friends in a week. I try to space out these things to like once a week if that! But because I have pushed a couple of plans, I realised that now all the plans are adding up in the one week. I guess it is just my personality. I just wish I would look forward to these things instead of wanting to cancel etc. I do like my friends of course. I am not sure why I am like this. I feel like I force myself to go to all social events. I would rather just stay home. But I do not want to turn into a recluse...so I push myself to go out.

I'm exactly the same op, I think it's a sort of social anxiety. Also I get mentally drained from being overly social so I too try to space things out if I can.

I could have written this! I’ve not always been this way, it’s just as I get older I have less energy to give to people. I used to love socialising. I now need weeks to prepare for a night out, I absolutely cannot have anything sprung on me. These people who say that unplanned nights out are fantastic baffle me! But I’m happy this way, I dont feel depressed or down that I’m staying in for the millionth time this year, quite the opposite, a week with no plans excites me more than anything. If you are happy op, then don’t analyse, just keep up contact with your friends and meet when your energy levels permit. The quickest way to feeling down for me is saying yes to things I want to say no to.

I look forward to things being over.

@sharpstick
You have described me. We should meet 😁 umm perhaps not 😂

user 😂😂😂😂

I never meet up with friends, in fact I don't have any because I don't want to do this. I'm happiest on my own or with family at home. I'm not depressed and wouldn't call myself a recluse (as I regularly go out for meals with DP and family I.e parents and ILs) it's just my personality - I prefer my own company. I too would hate to see 3 arrangements for one week and would most definitely cancel at least one if not all of them!

I could have written this, I'm a terrible friend and isolate myself. I do have depression but I'm unsure if this is part of it or I'm just an introvert

Good to know, it seems there are many who are the same :) And sharpstick, yes I totally relate to the needing a week at least to prepare for a night out! No last minute things for me ever!