Deep breathing does not WORK!

[Handlingit]

Just that really

I have been tasked with breathing exercises to tackle my anxiety and it’s ironically making me anxious because it’s not working.

I know it’s because my mood and anxiety has spiralled and it’s a bit like prescribing paracetamol for a broken leg but I feel pressured to make it work by CMHT. Saying that I have rang the duty worker and I am awaiting a call back - something else that is making me anxious.

I feel so desperately tired - I have been battling intrusive thoughts all day and my DS didn’t settle until midnight by which time I was wide awake.

I am so scared - there is a lot going on and the professionals around us have gone suspiciously quiet and are not answering calls or emails. It’s so so frustrating and I’m really really worried about what they are avoiding telling me.

I am so fed up...

Try drinking a full glass of cool water and tell yourself that you are drinking liquid oxygen. I know this sounds a bit daft, but I've been doing it since I was 12 and it works a fair bit. Also, step outside (if feasible) and gulp as much fresh air as possible. You will get through this.

If these panic attacks spiral out of control and do not cease, I would recommend visiting your GP for some Xanax or Ativan.

Best of luck to you!

Sorry to hear what you are going through

Can you tell us s bit more about the actual exercises ? I know a few different ones, only one of which ever works for me. Could you explain yours?

I sympathise so much. For years people would tell me to take 10 deep breaths like it would be a panacea for my extreme GAD & panic attacks (about 10 a day if not more). It was infuriating & I felt like a complete failure. However, now that I'm stable (with the help of ADs, therapy etc...) and have what I would describe as mild anxiety (& no more panic attacks) I do find breathing helps & love swimming, yoga & meditation. So I think breathing is a great self care tool but definitely not the answer to all MH probs. Are you getting any other support?

Beginners tai chi might help because you’re concentrating on matching the movements to your breathing.

Try pushing your feet on the ground. Really feel what the ground feels like. Are you wearing shoes and socks? Can you wriggle your toes? How much of each foot comes in contact with the ground?
Visualise a connection between yourself and the ground, the earth, grounding yourself through this connection.
Try to get out in nature as much as possible. Be present there. Look at all the different plants and trees, listen to all the sounds. Step after step, absorb your surroundings.
Exposure to nature regularly can help with mental health issues.

Sorry you’re so scared. Waiting for phone calls or letters always made my anxiety spiral too. Breathing didn’t work for me either at those times but a kind voice was better for me. Kristen Neff’s free self compassion meditation was amazing. Google her website self compassion Kristen Neff. When I’m doing better I find the breathing exercises helpful.

Find a square breathe in for a four count as your eyes follow the top line hold for four as you go down one side out for four as you go along the bottom. Then in for four as you go back up the next side hold for four along the top etc etc. I think this works as a distraction than the breathing thing actually working.

There is also name something you see something you hear something you smell something you can touch repeat till you feel calmer. It grounds you apparently but i think it also works by distracting you.

Remember panic attacks cant last more then about 20 mins as your adrenaline depletes. So as bad as it gets in 20 or so mins it will be over

Breathing exercises help panic attacks, this is not the same as deep breathing. It is because when you have a panic attack you take in too much carbon dioxide. That is what leads to you feeling dizzy etc. It does not I think help anxiety.
Lots of people I know say tapping therapies help with their anxiety. I don't know if you have tried that? You can teach yourself how to do it.

Have you tried a basic yoga class? It might help you focus the breathing and improve your technique.

I know it sounds daft but are you breathing right? It never worked for me because I was too focused on breathing in when breathing out is the important bit. I do it in groups of 5, breathe in for 5 and out for 6 which usually means having to push hard to breathe out.

I'm an ex-paramedic.

This is what I always told my patients:

Hyperventilation is NOT solved by breathing in MORE oxygen (even though it feels like it!)

If you've got to the shaky panicky stage (with pins and needles/numbness in hands/feet/lips etc) then you've actually been breathing in TOO much oxygen.

This is usually caused by one of two things:

(a) A patient has just suffered a nasty emotional shock and gulped in several huge breaths in succession. This is the most obvious and understandable reason.

(b) However - many, many people live large parts of their lives in a kind of CHRONIC, MILD panic:

EACH intake of breath appears normal, but is actually deeper/slightly more often than their body needs. The extra carbon dioxide builds up over time.

Think of this as a kind of bad habit - like biting your nails or picking your nose ...

SO, your body has used all this lovely oxygen, and in turn produced lots of carbon dioxide.

This carbon dioxide is now charging round in your bloodstream, causing all these weird feelings all over your body.

To get back to normal, all you need to do is get rid of the extra carbon dioxide.

Simples.

The best way of stopping a panic attack? (taken from my 11 years of 999 experience) ...

Understand how your body has got into this mess ...

That even though I had turned up in a flashy ambulance full of expensive equipment, I didn't need to use any of it ...

All you had to do was breathe out more than you breathe in...

I used to get my patients walking about slowly (which helps to calm the shakes) ...

Doing something boring (tidy a drawer, wash up, do some weeding, ironing, whatever) ...

And put some music on.

Then - and this is the magic bit - get them to hum along to the songs.

Keep doing the mindless tasks, and hum.

The humming will naturally slow their 'in' breaths ...

And help to prolong their 'out' breaths.

And that is LITERALLY all they need to do.

They calmly breathed out their extra carbon dioxide and returned to normal.

But, most importantly, they understood WHY it happened in the first place ...

That all those frightening feelings were not signs of an impending stroke or whatever ...

It was just that their body had got out of balance.

And, once they followed instructions and realised they had cured THEMSELVES ...

They no longer had the awful fear of it happening again.

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Sorry I fell asleep (finally!)

I have been advised to do the breathing exercises every hour of the day for a few mins. I don’t have panic attacks - just severe anxiety and agree if I was having panic attacks then absolutely breathing is the way forward.

However, the breathing exercise advice is the support I am getting!

I can’t swim / do yoga / tai chi or anything for myself as I have a child at home all the time. Hence being so stressed.

proper breathing will stop a panic attack - you can't have a panic attack if you breathe properly

but its useless for anxiety

In desperation I downloaded a hypnosis thing for anxiety and I have to say it was brilliant. He is called Glenn Harrold and on the face of it has the most unattractive voice but it really does the business!!

You could still follow online classes on youtube/app or ask your gp about Wellbeing prescription services which may include activities with childcare or your local children's centre. How old is your dc?

Have a look at Adriene's meditation videos on YouTube. Alternate nostril breathing can be really helpful once you've got the hang of it.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=8VwufJrUhic

It's not going to take away your worries, no breathing exercise is going to do that, but it might help to give you some clarity.

He’s 14 but has additional needs and he’s not at school as they can’t meet his needs. I hate leaving him as he very unpredictable - there is no way he would engage with childcare or anything like that

Will look up the hypnosis thing - worth a try

Alternate nostril breathing is the one that works for me. Start actually holding on nostril closed, breath in through the open nostril and out again through that one. Then in through the other nostril.

To start with I hold the other nostril closed but once I get the hang of it, it works just as well just thinking if the nostril. I think of it as guiding the stream of air in and back out then smoothly over to the other nostril.

If I notice I am thinking about anything else I ho back to the flow of air. Often fall asleep

@Lucky11111 great post, thank you

Ground yourself by finding:
Five things you can see
Four things you can touch
Three things you can hear
Two things you can smell
One thing you can taste

Do it over again as much as you need to. It's saved my bacon a few times!

Lucky, that’s one of the best, most revelatory posts I’ve ever seen on MN.

I can’t believe my whole life I thought deep breathing/breathing exercises were about getting more oxygen into your body, not getting rid of carbon dioxide. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen this written down anywhere and it makes so much sense!

thefifthkey

Glad to be of help!
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