Am I going to regret this?

[Scaredycax]

I have a phobia of flying; I've flown several times in my life, even lived in another country, but I have not flown in 5 years after having a panic attack on the plane.

Since then, I've had hundreds of dreams about being in falling planes and even about planes falling on the house.

I've since had 2 DCs and seem to have made a subconscious decision to holiday in England, rather than address my phobia. I rarely holidayed in England as a child and have uncovered some beautiful places on our doorstep over the last few years with my family.

However, I love other cultures and languages, exploring new places and I am concerned that I am going to look back on my life and hugely regret this.

I have explored the options of addressing my phobia but I am worried about not having this phobia anymore, getting on a plane and it killing us. I know how crazy and far-fetched this sounds.

DS has been learning about holidays and air-travel at nursery and he keeps asking to go on a plane. Am I going to regret holding everyone back by holidaying in England? I have fond memories of spanish holidays as a child, am I robbing them of something brilliant or are English holidays enough?

I didn't want to read and rhn but I think Easyjet run a course that might be helpful or perhaps you could talk to a therapist?

How about driving and using the Euro tunnel or a ferry?

I was able to conquer a fear of flying with CBT. Also I now take ADs which I think helps balance the fear. Before then I still flew but knocked myself out with diazepam and/or Zopiclone. They worked brilliantly, even for long haul, though I felt a bit groggy and 'hungover' after. Worth considering if you decide you'd like a holiday abroad. In terms of what your child needs, I'm sure fun & varied holidays in the UK would be lovely and give plenty of stimulation so there is no necessity to fly (IMO). You can also travel by land to lots of places in Europe which is fun - direct trains to France, Belgium & Amsterdam, ferries to Scandi countries etc... so there are plenty of other options too. Good luck!

I would pursue any avenues possible to cure you of your fear. It's terribly sad to deprive your DC of the chance to travel, let alone for yourself.

There are many courses, hypnotherapy, etc, it really should be possible if you commit to it.

download 'planefinder' app and watch all the thousands of live flights around the world and even just in the UK that are flying every minute without issue.

Always stuns me how many people scared of flying but think nothing nothing of placing themselves and children in a car on a daily basis where the chance of a fatality is hundreds of thousands of times more likely that any plane accident.

Scaredycax I had hypnotherapy a few years ago for flying phobia, and it changed everything. I wasn't as bad as you - I could fly, but I hated every minute of it, spent the week before dreading it and the whole holiday dreading the return flight, and every odd noise or bit or turbulence had me crossing myself and praying even though I'm an atheist these days.

Now I don't think about the flight until I'm on it, when I generally enjoy it. It's not magic and doesn't help everyone, but if you are open to changing your perspective it can be a great tool.

If you decide to take this route, for me, finding the right therapist was key. You need to have confidence in the person and they need to be right for you. I previously tried hypno for another issue, but I just didn't like/click with the person doing it and I think this is a large part of why it didn't help me that time.