Going away for a weekend - Partner "joking" he might be dead when I return

[BooRadley35]

I'm going away soon for a girls weekend with some friends for 3 nights. My partner has depression and anxiety. He takes medication and see's a therapist regularly. The main cause of his anxiety is that he has control issues which he accepts and is working on.

We don't ever spend much time apart and he greatly relies on me to help with his mental health issues. Selfish as it may seem, I need some alone time and a break with girls is just what I need.

However as the weekend is coming up, he feels I'm abandoning him and keeps saying " what if I'm dead when you come home". He has never been suicidal. I just feel this is him trying to control me and ensure I have a miserable weekend.

Thoughts and advice would be appreciated. I know I probably sound very harsh but dealing with a partner with mental health issues can be exhausting.

Maybe you could arrange for a helpful friend of his to come and stay for the weekend ? Or a family member etc ? Make it a special weekend for him too. That way they will appreciate just how much you are going through he might behave himself long enough for you to get a break .
Have a wonderful trip with you pals !

Definitely a control issue. Go. Enjoy yourself and don't give him much head space while you're away. You deserve and need this time away to recharge your batteries. And you don't sound harsh, just honest and tired. Have fun.

Controlling and manipulative. You deserve a break.

Don’t arrange anything on his behalf. He is not your child that you need to find “care” for whilst you are away.

Presumably he survived ok when you two were not an item, so he will survive again whilst you are away for 48 hrs. You are not being mean, self care is essential and he sounds manipulative and draining. You can’t rescue people from their mental health difficulties and you are doing them no favours by allowing their disfunction to sap you of your mental health. Go. Have a good time. Come back revitalized. And décidé if this is actually a healthy relationship for you If he makes allusions to suicide again, tell him to google the Samaritan’s - if you allow him to cross these boundaries now, he will only get worse.