Dp and I have been together just over two years. He has increasingly battled with anxiety over the last 10 years or so and it manifested in very jealous behaviour towards me which ended in him seeking counselling- he had about 6 months of hypnotherapy which was hugely helpful and I was so proud of him for taking action to improve his behaviour as it would have been over if he had continued.
But it's coming back. He's managing it, as in trying very hard not to accuse me/ ask me where I have been when he knows exactly where (er...work)/who I am messaging/whether I spoke to any men etc etc etc but the effort of this seems to actually be making him feel worse in himself and he is now depressed. He's snappy and irritable, intolerant and generally fed up of everyone and anything. For the record, I've never been unfaithful to him or anyone else ever and so his anxieties are completely unfounded in my case.
I am being as supportive as I know how. I certainly don't judge him, I've had sustained periods of low mood if not full depression so I appreciate a little of how his world might be.
One if the things that is an issue between us is that we dont live together, I'm not ready for it and neither are my children. (He also has children who live with him). He thinks that everything would be better if we lived together but I disagree totally, I want him to learn how to be happy before we take this step as I really don't think it would be the magic pill he thinks.
Am I being as unkind as he says? I just don't think I can go on supporting him when his behaviour towards me is making me so miserable. I feel terrible guilt though at potentially ending our relationship when he might need me to be his rock. I just don't think I can be :(