The Bipolar Support Thread

[BippityBoppity87]

Hi everyone Just thought I'd start a shiny new thread for anyone who is suffering from bipolar disorder.

Hope everyone is ok!

I've just felt a bit sick today, and I'm getting butterflies in my stomach again. It's not anxiety, mainly excited feeling. I hate that.

I got a letter this morning from an agency working on behalf of PIP. They will be writing to my psychiatrist to get information and if they get all the information they need I don't have to go for a medical but if they don't get all the info I do. God knows how long this will drag on for. Makes me ill 🤒

Are you moving to PIP from DLA? I’m still waiting for their decision, assessment was at the beginning of December I think. They wrote to say they were ready to make a decision at the end of December but still nothing. My DLA award was indefinite but I’m not terribly hopeful 😕

My psychiatrist was outstandingly unhelpful, confirmed diagnoses (bipolar and an eating disorder) but described everything as stable - which it is but that doesn’t make daily life as straightforward as someone without those conditions. I also asked them to consider how personality disordered I am since my problems with impulse control and emotional regulation are real but there’s no mention of it. Probably thinks he’s doing me a favour by not formalising it into a diagnosis or maybe genuinely doesn’t agree but it’s a bit invalidating!

I took a bit of a bad turn last night. I haven't been taking my aripiprazole as I got extremely paranoid. I will try and take it tonight though and. It let the intrusive thoughts rule my life. It is hard though.

Not let*

No why it's just my PIP renewal. I moved from DLA to OIP 3 years ago but it was fairly straightforward. I get CAB to help me with the forms which is a huge help but not for if I have an assessment, I get high rate just now so it will be a big loss.

bippoty sorry you're not feeling well. Remember to give your psychiatrist s call if you feel too bad you shouldn't have to suffer. Try keep taking your meds they really do help.

I'm going to try and persevere with it, there's just no one I can to about it in rl apart from my psychiatrist as I don't want the look. Which is horrible because I'm not 'crazy' my brain just doesn't work the same way as someone that doesn't have a psychiatric illness.

I've to go for an assessment on 5th February at 9am. I have nervous tummy already just thinking about it. I've no clue how to get to the place. My mum will come with me but it's central Edinburgh and I've not been to Edinburgh since my last medical.

I live in Edinburgh, where abouts is it?

Good luck 💕 the actual assessor I saw was lovely, it’s just the process as a whole I didn’t cope with well (they’d said all along it would be a home assessment). I had a lovely friend with me and my daughter and we recorded it (with permission).

bippity it's Osbourne Terrace. I'm terrified. I wish they wouldn't text you with these first thing in the morning. I've just took a diazepam. I'm like you why and will be okay on the day it's the whole process which knocks me off.

Wish I could have had a home visit.

Is it too late to ask for one? They were quite happy to do it until they had info from my records about me being violent and aggressive to random members of the public 🙈

I never had an assessment for DLA, they just used medical evidence so really didn’t know what to expect. It was nothing like the horror stories, she only asked about stuff relevant to my claim. I think I’ll definitely lose the mobility component but hoping I will still get the care part even if it drops to standard rate - but I haven’t had any bipolarly crises for a long time. I will really feel the loss of it, my eldest daughter will lose carers allowance too which enables her to study part time and support me with various things.

I've only ever had an assessment for ESA and previous to that I was on Incapacity Benefit so had to go for assessments every 18months.

Then when citizens advice we're talking to me about my ESA claim they said I could claim DLA and they would fill out all the forms, which they did, then I moved over to PIP again CAB filled out all the forms. No assessment. 3 years later and PIP was up for renewal. Yesterday got the letter saying they were contacting anyone dealing with me which is just psychiatrists (whom I've got an appointment with today) then I get the text saying they've booked the assessment.

The thing is I'm mainly stable. I would say I'm probably the best I've been in years since coming off the lithium but it just takes one thing to set me into panic and weird body shakes (like a text from PIP)

I don't go out much. I have the car to take me too appointments and chemist weekly but other than that I don't drive anymore.

I've resigned myself to the fact that I just had my last PIP payment and give myself a pat on the back for paying all my bills and not blowing it on stuff I don't need.

I've phoned CAB and asked for a copy of my application because they took my firm back to their office as they needed more info from my previous form.

Sorry about the long post. I talk a lot when I'm stressed and I'm sure the Valium make me worse

Oh no! @DiaryofWimpyMumm try not worry.

Please don’t apologise! It’s a horribly stressful process 💕

I should hear about mine any day now, the assessment was six weeks ago today. If I lose it entirely I’ll appeal but if it drops to standard I’ll just be grateful.

May I ask- Does everyone have a crisis plan? If so what do people put on it?
I had an appointment with a woman from IAPT service recently ,she wanted to write one with me but when I started talking and answering questions she put her pen down, stopped the plan and said I wasn’t suitable for any services they offer.
Quite about it.

Also, I wish everyone well on their PIP applications.

I have a crisis plan. Not much. Just put my partner and the early warning signs of a crisis approaching. Just one word emotions and what I do/how I feel etc.

I see, I think it may have been me responding with “I’d kill myself of course ”, when asked what I would do if I felt suicidal.

Can’t say a plan would be much use in my case. Thanks for answering.

That's odd Fission. What did you say? I just spoke about my anxiety, self harming, social withdrawal, feeling irritable etc. What the triggers were and my coping mechanisms.

Really?! How strange!

Yes. I’m really not sure what answer she was expecting .

Surely that's pretty much standard answer if you are feeling suicidal. What did they expect you to say?! The mind boggles.

My care plan has something about crises on it - I think it’s just: get lithium levels and increase if possible, someone to check in on me each day, more drugs, crisis/home treatment preferred to hospital but hospital if necessary. It doesn’t have any sort of plan for if I get depressed, they don’t care about that at all!