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Please can anyone help calm me down in the middle of an anxiety attack

22 replies

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 18:52

I'm freaking out. I've got another thread going about medication for anxiety and that is something I am going to look into but right now I cannot stop freaking out. I want to pass out and throw up. I feel terrified. I can't breathe. I'm here on my own with dcs - having to hold it together in front of them but am just going to go to pieces once they are in bed. DH won't be home from work until 10pm.

I have health anxiety, mainly focused on cancer. Previous attack a few weeks ago was triggered by someone I know (similar age to me) being diagnosed with colon cancer. Ever since I found out, I've had a "bruised rib" feeling and a stitch-like pain coming and going in my left side. Then I saw a fb video over the weekend about someone off tv who'd not been to dr for years but was having pains in his leg that he'd had for a while but they got worse so he went to see GP and found out he's got advanced prostate cancer that's spread to his bones. Obviously I know I have no prostrate but the bit about aching legs has triggered this current attack as I do sometimes suffer with achey hip and leg. Again always on the left side.

So now I am convinced that the rib pain is the cancer and it's spread to my bones and that is the pain I can feel. It's like I can literally feel it spreading around inside me and now my arm is aching too. The more I worry, the worse the pains get.

It seems so stupid writing it down but it is everything going through my mind. I know the pains are most likely a symptom of my anxiety - I always get pain/tenderness in whatever area my anxiety is currently focussed on. I am trying not to focus on it and distract myself but not doing very well. Current attack been going on since Sunday night. Keep thinking I'm feeling a bit better but then it washes over me again. Today has been horrible - I've gone to pieces several times.

I've got rescue remedy, Passion flower and valerian which I'm taking but no actual medication. I've tried exercise, YouTube meditations and repeating mantras to myself to say I'm not ill, it's just anxiety.

I've got a drs appointment but the earliest the could fit me in is Xmas eve. I want to ask the gp for a blood test to reassure me I don't have cancer but all I can think about is getting a call to go in to see doctor for the results and being told they've found it too late and there's nothing they can do. That's what is in my head all the time.

Sorry for long rambling post. I think I just need distracting but I wanted to try and explain how I'm feeling.

Is anyone there?

OP posts:
anitagreen · 28/11/2018 18:59

Hey please just go and make a cup of tea and breathe. It sounds so patronising and stupid but when I'm in the midst of a bad anxiety attack just doing a small task like making a cup of tea takes my mind of it just for a minute, whilst your waiting do some deep breathing deep breath in, count to 4, slow breath out,
Can you count 5 smells you can smell?
Can you see 5 different objects ?
What 5 colours can you see?
Keep doing your breathing you will be absolutely fine this isn't you it's your anxiety.
I suffer with anxiety and OCD pure o, which is mainly intrusive thoughts about dying so I know how scary it can be, I have around 70 moments a day where I get a thought of oh what if you die today? What if you want to die? So then I spend time in my head telling myself of course I don't want to I'll be fine, only to then repeat again hours later. I'm currently waiting for CBT and I hope it clears it off, have you thought about trying that too ? Xx

anitagreen · 28/11/2018 19:01

Download an app called head space that calms me down too.

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:03

Making a drink now.

5 things I can see - kettle, cups, tv, spoon, radiator

I've done cbt - had over 12 months worth of appointments which did help but they finished a couple of years ago. Been coping ok since then but struggling now since my friends cancer diagnosis.

OP posts:
hendricksy · 28/11/2018 19:03

Genuine question but do bloods always pick up cancer ?
If you have them will that out your mind at rest ? Are you in a position to pay to have a full mot , mri etc, bloods privately ?

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:04

5 colours - blue, brown, yellow, black, purple

OP posts:
SexNotJenga · 28/11/2018 19:04

Square breathing :

Count to 4, slowly, while breathing in.
Count to 4 slowly, while holding it.
Count to 4 slowly, while breathing out.
Count to 4 slowly, before starting again.

Keep at it for at least 5 minutes.

What things do you need to do tonight? What chores do you need to complete? What do you have to do to be ready for tomorrow?

Make a list, start ticking those things off. You are quite right that you need distracting. Your worrying thoughts achieve nothing. For an hour at least, try to replace them with something productive.

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:06

I've no idea for certain if bloods do pick up cancer but that was what was mentioned in the fb video I saw. The guy went to the gp about pains; the dr gave him an "mot" and that resulted in his cancer diagnosis.

No idea how much a full thorough check up would cost privately. I'd probably be too scared to do it in case it did show something.

OP posts:
Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:07

Thanks for the spare breathing reminder. I learnt that in cbt but had forgotten

OP posts:
Idratherhaveacupoftea · 28/11/2018 19:11

It's a specific blood test that he had, not your normal blood tests but one purely to check the prostate.

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:13

Ok so asking the doctor for a blood test wouldn't necessarily help?

OP posts:
hendricksy · 28/11/2018 19:19

But surely it's better to know then you can address it ? I don't for a moment think there is anything wrong , just saying .
I'm mid 40's and have soooo many aches and pains . It's perfectly normal to get pains at times .

SexNotJenga · 28/11/2018 19:20

Drop the blood test chat for now. It achieve nothing and focuses your attention back on the worry.

Make a list of jobs, OP.

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:21

hendrick that's what my husband says - that aches and pains are normal as you get older. I'm 39 and have had 2 kids so I'm sure my aches and pains are normal too. Well most of the time I am. Right now my brain will just not accept that. It's so silly. I know I am being completely irrational but my brain just won't believe anything else Sad

Anxiety is horrendous. Had it for 4 years now and thankfully most of the time it's under control but these attacks are awful. Wouldn't wish it on anybody.

OP posts:
SexNotJenga · 28/11/2018 19:22

How old are your kids?

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:23

8 & 6

OP posts:
SexNotJenga · 28/11/2018 19:26

Is all their stuff ready for school tomorrow? Any washing /ironing need doing?

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:28

Uniforms and school bags are sorted but I need to do packed lunch for one of them. I'm sitting upstairs with them whilst they read before bed at the mo

OP posts:
KatKit16 · 28/11/2018 19:29

I don't know if this works but they did it on Orange Is The New Black - star jumps! Apparently you can't have an attack at the same time! Might be worth a go ?? Get the kids joining in.

SexNotJenga · 28/11/2018 19:32

As good a time as any to get off MN for a while Wink

Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:33

Really kat?! I have hard enough trying to calm them down at bedtime as it is without getting them to jump around with me! I'll remember it for myself though

OP posts:
Wenchelda · 28/11/2018 19:33

Thanks everyone x

OP posts:
KatKit16 · 28/11/2018 19:47

I hope it passes for you soon hun x

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