To wonder why I haven't got everybody else has

[MelAnnCholie]

I have no one. No friends (drifted away) partner (not attractive) or family (dead)

There is no point to me being here and I am just putting in time until i die.

You are definitely not on your own, so please know that.
OP, do you like your job ?
I'm an introvert really, but meet many nice people, whilst I'm out walking my dogs. They're a blessing, I can walk them anytime, in any weather, if I want to get out and about.
If you do like dogs, and walking, maybe you could borrow one, the Cinnamon Trust, would be a good place to start.
Once you open one door, it's surprising how many more open for you !
Which part of the country do you live in ?

What are you interested in?

At work, have you developed any rapport with work-mates?

Volunteer work doesn't have to be depressing - it can be things like clearing beaches or painting community centres or building something (National Trust and local community groups, for example). Doesn't have to be doom and gloom.

With Christmas coming up and the New Year, how about planning something to do to start off 2019 well, like going away somewhere exciting or setting yourself some sort of target, (like visiting all the places beginning with A within 100 miles or training for a marathon or reading 50 books a year or learning a new skill).

Seeing the GP might be a good call if you're feeling so low and like there's nothing to look forward to.

Volunteering doesn't need to be in a care home, prison though or call centre though. It can follow things your interested in.

I'm a school governor and heavily involved on the school PTA, reading schemes and other projects. It's interesting as my kids attend and it's good to know what's going on etc.

That's why I asked what OP did?

I used to work for a charity that matched people up with volunteer roles,there is so much out there and people do it for lots of reasons. I know people who set up a charity where they taught circus skills and another friend who works at rock choir which I think, form what I have seen, practice then do these flags mob things amount other things. There is a whole host of things out there.

Just try something new.

ceecee. She’s an idiot, but at least she’s not the actual therapist! I hope you get a good one.

MelAnnCholie. Of course you’re not too unattractive to have a partner! Have you seen some married couples?!

You do sound actually depressed (rather than just down). Whilst you might not want to, I think seeing your GP might would help.

I think with volunteering it can be really, let’s say, ‘variable’. I pick and choose - carefully! The local charity shops would have me drinking gin before 9am, but the ‘wildlife habitat’ group is great.

It’s harder to make GOOD friends when you’re older as most people are busy and barely have time for their established friends and a lot of people who are actively trying to make friends are mums who are looking for ‘school hours’ friends.

It’s HARD when nothing excites you any more and every thing feels boring or pointless. When I have felt like this I TRY to appreciate the fact that I can physically & emotionally (no anxiety etc) do things that much any other people, who would like to, cannot and that we are ALL only on one accident or diagnosis away from not being able to do these things. So I TRY to make myself do stuff and when I do I sometimes enjoy it. Sometimes I don’t and it’s boring and shite 🤣😂

It’s hard to actually feel excited about life sometimes, but it’s worth trying 🍫🌷

Speaking from experience the problem with volunteering or taking up hobbies or classes is that unless it's something you're truly interested in (in which case you'd likely already be doing it seeing as you don't have commitments to friends or family) you take part being acutely aware all the time why you're there which can make you feel even more desolate.

OP I hear you. Many years ago I got home having passed my driving test first time and didn't have a soul to share my good news with. Literally no one. I have a DH now but still no friends (well one, but she lives the other side of the country and not the kind of friendship where I could text/ring for a natter). If you happen to be in the NW I'd be happy to try making friends!

There are MN Meet-up groups around the country.