Visiting hospice, mild panic.

[Vi37]

Hi everyone, I’m just looking for people who have visited a hospice to visit a loved one. My mother in law has just been put in one today due to terminal cancer, her pain can’t be controlled successfully at home. I just want any insight as to what they’re like before we go so I can prepare myself ( I have post natal depression/anxiety and ocd so it’s easier if I know things beforehand so I don’t panic) my main anxiety is the health of my son and we’re taking him in too so anyone who have taken their children in to visit would be great. Thanks in advance

Hospices are wonderful places and hopefully you will find your visit there very comfortable. They are so good at looking after people and that includes visitors as well. I think you will find your MIL is being taken care of really well. Children are also made very welcome. I hope your visit goes well.

I've only visited one hospice so I can tell you a bit about that one. It had parking in front and the main entrance had a reception desk like in a corporate building, and some easy/soft chairs in the foyer area. It felt less like a hospital than I'd expected, had signs up to show the way to the garden, the cafe and other communal areas. There were stairs and a lift up to the various floors and, once out of the lift, it was very easy to find the room we were visiting. Rooms were private and at the end of each little corridor there was a small room with comfy chairs, coffee table and magazines/books/games.

I've been in with my children and my friend's children. The vibe of the place was very friendly and the staff were lovely towards all of us. The rooms themselves had things like a pinboard so my friend's children had drawn pictures to be displayed on there and there were family photos up too.

Every hospice will probably be different but it might be possible for you to see inside by looking on the hospice website or Facebook pages so you know a bit more before you go.

They are about a quarter student hall of residence, a quarter nursing home and half nice hotel. With lots of nursing staff going around checking on everybody.

My MIL went into a hospice when I was six month pregnant, she was only there a week before she passed away. It was honestly a lovely place, the staff were all absolutely amazing and went above and beyond to help us in any way they could. They also offered counselling to us when we were there. The atmosphere was not somber as I expected, but full of positivity. We go to all their fundraisers and rememberence services now and DD has come, and everyone has been wonderful with accommodating her and including her in an age appropriate way. MIL had been in hospital for a few days before she was moved to the hospice and that was a horrible environment, the hospice was the polar opposite and it was quick to get members of staff to help unlike in the overworked hospital ward.

My friend is in a hospice. Its so lovely. I was dreading going too figuring I'd get emotional. Its not the end of the road going into a hospice. The end of the road is obviously nearer for those who go into them but in no way is it a final journey. But for those who do find that they may not come out again, based on my experience I couldn't think of a better place to be.

My mum is in one and we go every day.
She has a view of the beautiful garden and watches the semi-tame squirrel, a cat and a woodpecker.
It’s very spacious with nice art and unlike in hospital, patients can have flowers next to their beds.
Each bed has a hand knitted coverlet and a patchwork quilt, it’s bright, peaceful and pretty.
The staff are bloody brilliant.