I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder in March of this year. I am a 19 year old female and I keep thinking I'm okay and then I go backwards again. I do/say stupid things without thinking and then when it's realised what I've done I have a full scale emotional breakdown where I say things like I don't want to be alive anymore etc. I'm trying to stop self-harming and when something happens it sends me backwards.
The associated anxiety that I have with the disorder gives me problems in communicating with others and due to having such low self esteem I 'mask' my anxiety with complaints about how I feel/problems in my life. Which obviously annoys people. I don't know what to do anymore but I can't keep going on like this. Please give me some advice