I can't really put my finger on why I feel as I do or even what I can do to help myself. I am a mother of 5 children, happily married with a good career. My youngest started school in September and I was always really keen to get back to work full time. I am fortunate enough that my career is term time only, and I finish at 4pm every day, so most people would be happy with this!
However, I feel constantly overwhelmed, constantly feel I'm letting someone down - I feel awful that I don't take the children to school every day, feel like I'm failing at everything as I can't focus 100% on everything - as such I feel I'm not 100% great at work, as a mother, as a wife, in keeping the house nice because I feel my time is so limited in every area. I feel I have made a mistake going back full time as soon as my youngest started school, but there is nothing I can do to rectify that now.
On top of this I am studying for a post graduate qualification in a specialist area, so as soon as the kids are in bed, I have to juggle this too.
I feel the most immense guilt permanently. I had to have a day off work before half term as my youngest was in hospital and I build it up in my head that I'll be sacked or thought badly of because of it and feel so guilty for work.
If I go to the gym, I feel sick with guilt for that hour in case the children feel I'm not there for them! I haven't had sex with my husband in about 2 months as I'm too tired (he does not complain at all), so I feel guilty that I am not being a good wife either.
I don't know how to get rid of this guilt 
No one would suspect I feel like this in real life but I am exhausted in having to keep up the charade with everyone thinking I excel in all these areas when in reality I'm drowning.
I'm on sertraline and a beta blocker for anxiety (again, something no one would possibly even suspect I suffer with!)
But with a term time only job how can I possibly feel like this?