DH just told me he doesn't feel like he has a purpose anymore. Please help!

[Zara87]

Been a shit year, dh (34) mother passed away the day our baby was born 8 months ago.
He's a very closed book and seemed to be getting on okay. However the last 3 or so months he's become very snappy, miserable to be around, everything is an argument all the time. Constant point scoring. Zero patience with our 2 young children.
Today i jokingly called him Victor Meldrew in passing after he had bitten my head off over something insignificant and he just burst into tears and told me he doesn't feel like life is worth living. He doesn't feel he has a purpose. Everything he does at home is wrong, I make him feel useless and I belittle him. He misses his mum and feels guilty he wasn't there for her at the end.
I am so shocked, I told him he must seek help but after around 10 mins the guard went back up and he wouldn't talk again. This was the most emotion I've seen him show for 8 months.
I'm absolutely terrified he will do something stupid and I don't know what to do.
I have had 2 people I know commit suicide in the last 2 months. They weren't close to me but nobody had a clue things were bad for them and now I feel like I am missing the signs with dh.
Please help! Where do i start to make him realise that everything he feels is so far from the truth!

I really feel for you. Xxx
What was your dh like before his mum passed? Do you think everything stems from that? It must have been such a tough time- the joy of a new baby combined with the deep sadness of losing his mum.
I would tell him repeatedly how much you love him. Could he be convinced to see his doctor?

OP It sounds like he hasn't dealt with his bereavement by a long chalk. Guilt on top of the actual loss is an appalling emotion to try and deal with and can really knaw away at someone mentally. Honestly if it were me, I'd actually make a GP appointment with a GP that you like and trust. Try and get a referral for some talking therapy and some medication. I wouldn't delay this; just say your worried and you think he needs help asap. Depression can be very dangerous.
You've probably told him that you love him and he's a brilliant Dad, but do it more and be close to one another if you can. Hugs really help grieving.

The NHS are trialling a new online CBT service where we live called Ieso online talking therapy. Here's the number 0800 074 5560
And the link is www.iesohealth.com
I really hope this helps, don't delay seek help asap. 💐

www.iesohealth.com/en-gb/patients
Hi again - found the link page for online therapy he could try - free and NHS xxx

Thanks so much. I'm really grateful. We have spoken a lot the last couple of days and he has agreed to go to the gp
Thanks again:-) x