Do I need a councellor or a life coach?

[Awrighttreacle]

I am lonely and I want to pay someone to be my friend.

Just kidding. Kind of. I have DH and a handful of friends but still sometimes feel lonely and crave someone to understand me and listen to me without judgment or agenda. DH works long hours and I don't often see friends often enough for in-depth chats.

I also feel guilty for hogging the conversation and talking about myself. I guess I am a pretty closed book. In a nutshell I want to pay someone to talk to about life, how I'm feeling, what worries I have that week, what celebrations I have.

Someone over facetime or skype, so its easy to do regularly. I have used both before and can't decide which would be best. I guess I don't necessarily want to achieve an 'end goal' - I just want someone to talk to.

Do I need a coucellor or a life coach do you think?! Does anyone else feel like this.

Counsellors vary a lot, some will just keep asking you what you think and listening, others will engage more in a two way conversation. It's worth trying to find one but don't expect the first one you find to be the best one for you. Have you thought about widening your social circle as well? Perhaps joining clubs/groups/volunteering? The more people you meet the more likely you are to find a friend who is just what you're looking for x

Heidimay's suggestions are great. If you do decide to pay someone, sounds like you'd benefit from counselling rather than life coaching. The former is an empathic listening ear who helps you explore feelings and examine problematic thinking, the latter more of a motivator for professional development.

Thanks for your replies, good people.

Yep I already do quite a lot of volunteering, and am actually managing a massive volunteer project at the moment. I guess I find it relatively easy to make social contact with people on a surface level, but miss that genuine and close connection you can have with someone where you can bare your soul, warts and all.

Maybe that's something to explore in councelling then.

Definitely a good suggestion to try several. I need to set myself a goal to book three skype calls with three different councillors, then decide which I gell with the most.

I'd say counsellor/therapist based on what you want. Be clear with them about what you think would benefit you and ask about their style and the way they work.

Thanks Countess. Have contacted one and will find two more to book in today.

Or a spiritual teacher