I’ve been on medication for depression for 3 years now. I’ve had times where I came off it as I was feeling good and the doctor advised it but I very soon went downhill again. Lately I felt worse than ever, more able to function than I have been when I was ‘bad’ before, but thinking of suicide every day. Looking into news stories at methods etc. I don’t think I’d ever do it, but I wished I could. My dose was put up around 6 weeks ago and it got worse. Went to docs yesterday and he suggested switching to a different medication. And put me on waiting list for counselling. I called in sick to work yesterday because I just couldn’t get myself out of bed, and that’s when I made the appointment. I feel like I need a couple of weeks to get going on the new meds, talk to people, sort my head out a little. So I’m going to stay with my family for a bit, I’ve told work I’m going to be off for at least a week, and that I’ll have a doctors note when I return. I know they’re going to find out from docs note why, but I just can’t bring myself to tell them myself. Now I’ve had a text from manager asking the reason so she can do paperwork. I just don’t know what to say how do I put it into words without sounding dramatic or fake, I already feel like a fake because when I’m with people I can be absolutely fine. But then the drive home I feel like dying. I don’t want to have to tell them via email/text but I don’t know what else to do. Any advice please?