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Mental health

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Original poster

Feeling triggered by high profile suicides this week?

19 replies

4dogs · 09/06/2018 14:52

There have been three high profile suicides by hanging this week, does anyone else feel triggered by them? I am not planning to kill myself but do have a lot of suicidal thoughts (am in regular contact with MH team).

OP posts:

NothingElse · 09/06/2018 17:28

Yes. I'm glad you said that.
I also deal with people in my job who tell me about suicidal thoughts, attempts etc. It's not easy even when you're feeling ok.

AcrossthePond55 · 09/06/2018 17:43

Not me, but I have to admit that we are a bit concerned about our DS2 who has PTSD and depression. Kate Spade didn't affect him but he was affected by Anthony Bourdain as he's a big fan. We've talked about it a bit and far he seems to be dealing with it rationally.

Hope you are able to 'put it where it belongs' and move forward.

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 09/06/2018 17:48

I have been worrying that people might feel like this. Please know that you are never alone. There is always someone you can talk to.
Samaritans 116 123

Kate8989 · 09/06/2018 20:03

Yes, I’ve had suicidial thoughts the past couple of months. I try and be positive about life, but when I hear about others commiting suicide, it’s like it affirms something in me that life is so hard and I won’t make it through.

apurpleglow · 09/06/2018 20:13

I find it unsettling (and of course sad). I'm glad you are in regular contact with your MH team OP. Please keep talking to whatever support you have. Sometimes feelings/thoughts lose their power when shared.

I remember when i couldn't imagine ever feeling better. But somehow things shifted. Enough little shifts for the darkness to ease. And little by little it got bearable and even at times good. I hope that happens for others.

Samaritans can be great. They don't always have the perfect words but they are real people who care. You don't have to be alone with your feelings.

@AcrossthePond55 I'm so sorry to read about your DS. I've talked to you lots as yoshimi. Sending my warmest wishes for you and DS2.

apurpleglow · 09/06/2018 20:18

Kate I'm a slow poster. Cross posted. I hope you have some real life support.

colouringinagain · 09/06/2018 21:22

Yes. It's brought it right to the front of my mind and I'm struggling to think of much else.

Kate8989 · 09/06/2018 21:48

@apurpleglow- had a lot happen this year, lost my baby, family problems, diagnosed with bowel endometriosis and awaiting a second op to remove. Lot to take in in 5 months... suicide just seems an answer sometimes to what feels never ending problems x

AcrossthePond55 · 09/06/2018 23:04

@apurpleglow Thanks. It's been a struggle for him but he's determined to rise and conquer.

Hope all is well with you.

Peace to all who are affected by suicide or with loved ones who are struggling with MH issues.

Original poster

4dogs · 10/06/2018 11:33

@kate8989 that’s how I feel, suicide is a possible answer to all the problems. I had stopped feeling like that until all the high profile suicides this week. I’m sorry to hear others are feeling like this but at the same time it makes me feel less alone with these feelings.

OP posts:

MNHQ

LornaMumsnet · 10/06/2018 11:51

Hello all, we are really sorry to hear you've been affected by this.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources. You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.

Kate8989 · 10/06/2018 12:07

I’m having a down day today. Was feeling really positive yesterday but slept for 12 hours last night and then scoured the Internet for negatives stories related to my health condition this morning and feel so so depressed. So tempted to go into the fridge and have some alcohol to take the edge off xx

Original poster

4dogs · 10/06/2018 12:41

Stay away from the alcohol Kate, it’s a depressant so won’t help. Have you got ang RL support?

OP posts:

AcrossthePond55 · 10/06/2018 15:08

Oh Kate, please don't. DS2 is having the same struggle but so far is managing with our support. Alcohol may 'numb' you for a few hours but it won't make the problems or hurts go away. Please take the alcohol out of the fridge (and the rest of the house) and pour it down the drain. We don't keep any in the house anymore out of respect for his struggles and we won't until DS2 gets back on his feet and moves out.

Are you seeing anyone for trauma therapy? You've certainly had enough in the last five months to tip anyone's canoe into the stream. You deserve to have all the support from every source that you possible can.

Kate8989 · 10/06/2018 15:23

@AcrossthePond55- Hey, I haven’t had any alcohol today. It makes my endometriosis worse so I do try and stay away.
The problem is people’s sympathy/understanding is wearing thin now and I understand that because what else is there left to say? Miscarriage is done and dusted, family problems have happened can’t be changed. I’ve got this severe endometriosis diagnosis and awaiting a big op to sort out. So in everyone else’s eyes it’s like well stay positive you’re having an op. But they fail to recognise its me having to go through it and put my body through it. That’s why I feel so alone because I feel as if I’m not allowed to feel the way I do x

AcrossthePond55 · 10/06/2018 15:47

I hear you. Have you sought counseling? Sometimes it's good just to have an ear to hear you, iyswim. And a good counselor can offer suggestions as to how to put things 'to bed' in your mind as it were.

Just because things are in the past or there's a 'solution' on the horizon doesn't mean that you aren't entitled to be struggling with them, nor does it mean that you should no longer talk about them and be heard.

Original poster

4dogs · 10/06/2018 16:59

@Kate8989 that sounds difficult. I know what you mean, my DP gets cross if I say I’m suicidal and his patience is wearing thin with my depression and general despondency.

OP posts:

Kate8989 · 10/06/2018 20:32

Problem is I’ve developed a mild form of agoraphobia so find the concept of commiting to see a counsellor difficult (I know I’m a right mess).
My Husband has been fantastic but I’m concious to not put too much on him. He went through the loss with the miscarriage aswell and he’s also going through a loss of his wife at the moment as I’m not myself, mentally or physically. I know it’s hard for him seeing me like this, I’d be the same if it were him x

AcrossthePond55 · 10/06/2018 23:22

I'm in the US @Kate8989, and I know things are different here because of our health care systems being different, but in the US you can get counseling by phone and also by video chat. Maybe you could check out and see if there is something similar in the UK?

You are not a right mess. You're a human being who has been through significant trauma in a few short months. I think you must be pretty strong deep inside to still be even on your feet. Right now, though, you just can't see that.

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