Witnessed an attempted suicide

[Spottyyellowdress]

I’m not sure this is the best place to post - and if it needs moving, let me know. This will be long.

This morning on my run I saw a man climb to the other side of a motorway bridge. As soon as he saw me he panicked and climbed back over. I stopped and asked if he was okay - he didn’t speak to me but walked on so I hung around a bit and then walked with him. He went in the opposite direction to me so I went home, called 101 and reported it. Out the window I saw him again, going back towards the bridge - ran out and tried to talk to him again. Again, he walked away. He just looked utterly despondent - not drunk or anything, just not in his own body.

I can’t stop thinking about it and checking traffic reports and knowing I didn’t do enough. Almost a year to the day I was in exactly the same position and luckily was taken to hospital before any severe damage was done. It feels like a punch to the stomach whenever I think about it and the way his face looked. Trying to talk to Dh about it but he can’t understand why it’s affected me so much as it’s ‘nothing to do with [me]’.

What an awful situation. That poor man, and poor you, too, for today and for last year.

I'm really glad you're in a better place now and hope he is, too.

Thanks so much - means a lot that someone gets it! I hope you’re having a lovely weekend.

You couldn't really have done anything else. You tried to help and you phoned the police to let them know.
I think it's strange that your DH can't see why it has affected you though.
Try not to let it play on your kind too much. Hopefully the man has someone who can help him.

Mind, not kind.

well done for intervening, I hope you are in a much better place these days it's a long slow climb up from the abyss of despair

@timeisslippingaway I hope he has too. I think DH is meaning well by telling me to not dwell on it and that someone else’s problems can’t let me slip back again but just doesn’t quite understand.

Something similar happened to me, I walk over a bridge popular for suicide every day.

One day a man was sat on the floor looking at the edge. I asked was he ok, he said no and he was going to jump. I sat with him a little while and just said that things are never as bad as they seem, there is always someone that would miss him.

I was so scared of saying the wrong thing and said did he want me to call someone? He begged me not too.

I said I had to go and walked a little way away and called 999 (where he couldn't hear me).

They got him down and some help but I still wonder how things ended up for him.

@dextro I’m so glad you could help. Thank you for sharing that and I hope he’s in a much better place now too.

Just by stopping and talking to him, however briefly, you have helped. You provided a distraction from a spiralling train of thought. That can be enough to save someone’s life. You also called 101 so hopefully he will have got some support.

Please don’t beat yourself up for helping someone in a desperate situation.

I know how you are feeling, it really does touch you. It was maybe 3 or 4 years ago and I still occasionally think of this man. Be kind to yourself, you did everything you could and hope my saved a life!

That level of mental health despair a huge number of people don't get, they can't comprehend it. As one who has, on both sides, thank you for stopping, for caring, and I hope you're in a better place now Spotty. Hardly surprising your hubby can't understand either.

@simplysteve you’re right, it’s impossible to explain. I hope you are too.