Feeling very low

[Imjustamum3]

Does anyone else feel useless all the time ?
I feel like a nobody.
I have three children...I'm not allowed to work (OH won't pay child care costs ) I don't go to college. I have no interests, hobbies ..I don't even get to the hairdressers. OH works long hours.
Any money I have the OH gives me. I don't personally own a single thing .
I have a virtually non existent relationship with my parents - not for lack of trying on my part they are just not bothered .
OH is always working or on bloody FB.
Everyday is like Groundhog Day..if I say anything to OH I'm being stupid ..or told I have mental issues ...I need to see a doctor .. or I'm ungrateful. I go days without having a real adult conversation.
I have no life ..today I felt like ending it all !
Doesn't anyone else feel like all you are is a mum ...without a name ! Just a mum
Sorry it's my first time posting on here and I needed a vent x

How about doing a course? You could contact your local college and see what they offer. It might be good for your self esteem.

Sounds like OH has sapped your self esteem and self confidence.
Do you love this person? How are they your partner?
If you work can't you pay some childcare costs? You need a life. Some kind of hobby and a haircut. What do you want OP?

He sounds abusive, no doubt you’d feel a millions times better without his shitty self.
Have you anyone in RL to speak to? I’d recommend speaking to women’s aid as well, you don’t have to keep living such a crap existence.

But you’re not just a mum.. You are a mum and you’re doing an amazing job, and while currently your feeling low.. Just try and remember you’re a good person.. I can speak from personal experience when you’re in that hole, it’s hell, but honestly pat your back you’re doing an amazing job..

Sorry OP Your husband does sound like he's being abusive to you. He's treating you like a slave, ignoring you & bullying you.
Having parents who ignore you too...no wonder you are feeling so low.
Mumsnetters always recommend Womens' Aid.
They're there to help women in your situation, definitely give them a call!

There's a great book that might help you too, I found it amazing when I was at a very low point. I was on the receiving end of some nasty treatment from others & even though I was prone to depression, this treatment caused me to hit rock bottom. This book was a real life saver. It really lifts you up to cope better with life, no matter what situation you are in.

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/0380810336/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ref=plSrch&keywords=feeling+good+the+new+mood+therapy&dpPl=1&dpID=51JFDdtE59L&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&tag=mumsnetforum-21&ie=UTF8&qid=1526284093&sr=8-1

I know you say you've no hobbies, could you develop some?
There's this great website where you just pay about £3 per month & you can do any of their online classes:-

www.creativebug.com/

Firstly, hoping today is better for you. I totally get how you feel, life is so hectic with 3 kids and there is often no time to breathe.Even though you are an equal partner that works in the home, it's sometimes hard to feel that way if you aren't earning a wage, that was always the nagging feeling in my head. Also you can never clock off from being a Mum, with a job outside the home you get a feeling of, I've done my work now I deserve a rest/ time out/ to do something fun. After years of putting everyone's needs first I've forgotten about me, it's caught up. Things that might help you and that have helped me (although I'm a work in progress), an hour fast walk to get out in the air during the day once a week or 20 min jog. Part time job that is sociable (catering is flexible, I work only school hours a couple of days a week) or volunteering to get experience of something and meet different people and build your confidence. If you can, meet up with someone (old friend, school mum) a couple of times a month, withdrawing myself was such a mistake and made me feel so much worse. Also a call to a counselling advice group like mind matters might help. I had felt so down/anxious for so long with each day gradually getting me down even more that I thought it was normal. Now i know I have to prioritise myself a bit, it's hard remembering that I'm worth it but it's important to look after our mental health. Sorry for long post.