Am I depressed or just miserable?

[GentlyGentlyOhDear]

I'm posting as I don't know whether to go to the doctor about this, or if it is just how my personality/life is at the minute and I am miserable, rather than suffering from depression.

I'm quite irritable, low, and grumpy most of the time at the minute. I get cross so easily about things and just have no interest in doing anything 'fun'. The kids and DH are outside with the paddling pool having fun and I just don't want to be out with them, so I've done more housework and now I'm sat upstairs on laptop on my own. I also seem to cry quite easily about nothing in particular.

Is this just they way most people feel with two young children and a husband to run around after?

That sounds a lot like depression to me (I’ve had it several times)

Please do go to the GP. There are specific diagnostic questions they will ask you to confirm it.

I’ve found CBT extremely helpful in the past, in some areas you can self refer.

Do also consider anti depressants, I am always reluctant to take them but they can be helpful especially if the depression is moderate to severe.

PS I hope your husband is running around after you as much as you are him

Just ti day definitely try CBT.
Seen such great results.

Sounds like depression to me too but a dr is best placed to diagnose, you don't need to know for sure before you go to dr.

Anger/impatience/irritability is rarely mentioned as a symptom but it's a common one.

Lots of people who are depressed are more numb than tearful too.

Go and have a chat with dr. Certainly can't hurt can it?

Sorry you're going through this, wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Thanks for the responses. I've had anxiety in the past, but it doesn't feel quite like that. I haven't been sleeping well and the doctor prescribed me amitriptyline but I've not taken it as I don't think the trouble sleeping is the problem, if that makes sense? I might go back and have another word. Will look into CBT too.
Another husband isn't too bad, to be fair, but would never think of the jobs to do himself, but will do them when prompted. He is also happy to live in a shit tip; I am not!!

Sounds pretty like depression. How long have you felt this way? Depression is a lot more than just feeling sad and grumpy, it’s the hopelessness, irritability and lack of motivation that’s very typical of depression. I also found I get very very tired, a whole new level of fatigue that doesn’t go away when you sleep.

Graphista I initially put the irritability and bad mood down to PMT, but it is literally all the time now, so don't think it is hormonal.

I just feel generally a bit fed up of everything. I feel so guilty because I'm not being the best mum I should be and I don't want my children to notice that I'm not enjoying time with them.
It's crept up on me over the last couple of months I think upsy. We had a stressful house move then there was a restructure at work where myself and my job share have been given an extra 3 days a week work on top of our full time job, so it has been stressful. The stress and anxiety isn't too bad, but I'm struggling with motivation and feeling any sort of desire to do anything or enjoying things.

It’s textbook depression tbh.

Amitryptiline is an anti depressant not a sleeping pill. Plus sleep is essential for mh. It's why sleep deprivation is used as a method of torture - cos it fucks you up mentally!

Take the amytriptiline, see your dr about possible referral for therapy.

It does creep up on you that's the nature of mh issues unfortunately.

Hi OP as others have said, it sounds like depression. Amitriptyline can help.

I'm also struck by the fact that as mums we put ourselves under a lot of pressure to be a perfect mum and give the kids a wonderful time. But sometimes on a sunny bank holiday you don't feel great, and you don't have the resources to be playing in the garden, and that's OK. Obviously seek treatment for yourself, but also be kind to yourself. Take care.

Are you getting enough exercise?eating good food ? Sleeping well?

Is yes to all above, I would say depression.

@harajukubabe

I disagree. One of the symptoms of depression is lack of motivation for self-care. And lack of self-care can cause depression, so it’s a vicious cycle. Whether or not the OP is doing those things, she sounds depressed - but given the depression she’s not likely to be doing them.

Thanks so much for all of the kind messages and reassurance. I went out for a walk with the dog on my own last night and I think it did me some good. I think it is the pressure of feeling like I 'should' be doing fun things with the kids all the time and 'making memories'(!) that makes me feel even more guilty. It is definitely feeling like I just don't have the resources to do some things at the minute; sort of a bit empty? I can't quite put my finger on the feeling which is slightly unnerving!

@GentlyGentlyOhDear I don’t have any advice other than to offer you sympathy as I identify completely with how you feel. I’m reluctant to go to the Dr or tell DH. Does anyone know how to access cbt themselves?

Alibaba you could find a private practitioner via www.babcp.com/Public/What-is-CBT.aspx I've also used a book which was quite useful - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): Evidence-based, goal-oriented self-help techniques: a practical CBT primer by Christine Wilding but I'm not sure how well you would get on doing this without any other support.

@alibaba
In some areas you can self-refer for CBT. Google IAPT plus your city/town or county.
In my area you can self-refer via an online form or over the phone.