Really struggling to cope here.

[fizzbuzz]

On Thursday dp's father died unexpectedly. Dp is like a zombie in total shock as would be expected.

Dd 10 months has been ill since Thurs with vomiting and exploding bum. Is very grizzly and wingey as you would expect.

Dp has been spending most of his time at his mums house, and I have been looking after dd. However It is very difficult, as she can't go anywhere, so I have even been unable to do things like go to bank/post office etc.

Dss age 17 and 20 also upset. Also have my ds age 13. Am returning to work on Thurs after a years mat leave. Have asked if I can postpone it for a few days but they won't let me.

Dd too ill to go to childminder at moment.

I am coping (or rather not coping) with entire household, washing, cleaning, cooking, shopping, looking after ill dd and trying to help dp. Just cannot do it all, and feel like I am losing my grip. I am returning to work full time.

Kids will help if asked, but basically are doing F all. I simply cannot cope with everything at once. Have had help from people, but they can't help all the time.

My own mum died 12 months ago, and this has brought everything back. Dd too ill to go to childminer on Thurs so will have to stay with dp who is in no fit state. he would take her to his mum's, but she is too ill to travel. Mil was due to look after dd on Mondays, will obviously now be in no fit state, and childminder doesn't work Mondays.

Just don't know what to do.....

Poor you, sounds like a warzone....could you not make a plea for bereavement leave at work?

My Hod has gone to see boss today, and is phoning back.

However part of me wants to go back to escape. I very much doubt work will comply tbh.

I'm no expert on these matters but even though your maternity leave is up you are still entitled to sick leave running straight on from that and from the sound of your post you are sounding very stressed.

Why not report in sick and get the next week or so under control then you can return to work with a few more things sorted.

I could cope with bereaved dp, and sick dd

I could cope with going back to work and bereaved dp.

I could cope with all housework etc and sick dd, and bereaved dp if not going back to work

But I just can't cope with everything....

TBH, I want to go back to work for a rest....

Fizz if you're DD is ill, you won't be productive at work (even though it would be an escape ). Hope your HoD comes up trumps....chin up love, DP will start to function normally soon and DD will get better - you just need a bit of time.