Anyone with health anxiety!!?

[Kate8989]

Always assume I have the worst form of things. I think I do it as a form of “preparation” incase bad things happen but it’s not helpful...
Anyone else the same!? I’m having a lap on Thursday and expecting the worse (thanks to Dr Google!) x

I have health anxiety. It’s horrible. Although a lap is perfectly safe so you’ll be fine

Thank you... im sat here thinking of the procedure and what they’ll do to me whilst I’m asleep. I’m really freaking out... but I also really want it done as I’m in pain everyday x

I’ve been put to sleep before, it wasn’t bad at all. It will be worse in the long run to have the pain and worrying it’s something awful!

May I ask what you were put to sleep for?! That’s what I’m most scared about... never had a general before. I’m proud for making the decision to have the lap as I know a lot of people wouldn’t but I can’t live with this pain anymore x

I've had general twice. I was probably anxious about the anaesthesia for the first, fat more anxious about them fixing the problem for the second.

The first was for getting all four wisdom teeth removed and the second I had to wait six months to get a bone tumour in my hand removed. I was worried it was cancerous (because of googling my symptoms and preliminary diagnosis).

Turns out it was a different type of tumour (super rare) but was benign! So I had six months of agony and worry and it did take about 18 months after the surgery for me to be in no pain (probably because of how big the bone tumour was by then). Oh and it was in my right hand and I couldn't even hold a pen because of the pain.

The surgeries themselves felt like they lasted five minutes. My biggest piece of advice is when the surgery is over and you wake up, it's ok to fall back asleep. Don't feel like you have to be full of energy at that point.

A lap is very routine. You're anxious about the unknown, which means s quite understandable. Just trust in your healthcare providers.

@physicskate thank you! It’s helpful talking to others as it makes me realise there is a big wide world out there with lots of people who have operations.....
I know mine is straightforward and routine, i just want it done and dusted so I can move on with my life and not be in fricking pain anymore!!!
I mean it’s a beautiful day and I’m sat in bed with a hot water bottle and TOWIE... I’m taking co-dyramol and ibruprofen and it’s making me constipated so I feel even more uncomfortable. I just think how will i be a week today? Happy and pain free or distraught at what they’ve found and my future x

I’m feeling suicidal again today

I don’t know your story kate and you can tell me to do one lol but maybe instead of focusing on ttc, you could spend a little time away from it to work on your mental health? I realise that sounds really patronising but it seems that the whole process is making your anxiety much worse and if ttc does that then pregnancy does it tenfold. Are you having any kind of therapy/counselling at the moment? I’m sorry you’re feeling like this, you really need to speak to someone if you’re feeling suicidal. I do suffer with anxiety myself, specifically health anxiety but it’s been a very very long time since I got to the point of feeling suicidal even with all the things I’ve been through including doctors appointments, procedures etc. I wouldn’t be putting myself through this hell if I thought I wasn’t mentally in a place where I could overthrow those kinds of feelings. It’s hard, I understand.

I had a miscarriage in January and I’ve pretty much been in pain ever since. I’ve got problems with my family (which I don’t have a lot of anyway).. I’m having an operation on Tuesday and fear the worse about what they’re going to find and what my life will be like going forward. I don’t have a life so what’s the point in living? X

**Thursday

You do have a life. I’m really sorry to hear you had a miscarriage, that can’t have been easy :( But please remember, it doesn’t define you. Your fertility doesn’t define who you are or how you should live your life. It’s possible they will find nothing with your lap, they may find something but if they do, they will treat it. It could be scar tissue from your miscarriage (assuming you had a d&c) that often causes constant pain. After you’ve had your lap done, you have your whole life to look forward to. I’m now in month 19 of ttc with no pregnancies and I have planned a holiday in the summer because I just want something to look forward to where I don’t have to think about all of this.

I haven’t been suicidal whilst ttc but there have been times when I’ve been very very down. Wondering “why me?” and why I can’t just get pregnant like everyone else seems to. I’ve had a lot of “what’s the point?” moments and had times where I’ve sobbed saying I just can’t do this anymore. I had a termination 3 years ago that I didn’t want to have as I desperately wanted to keep the baby and so now that I’m not able to have a baby, it affects me very negatively, even more so than it did when I first had it done.

My family aren’t supportive of us ttc. My mum once called me selfish for being sad about not being pregnant because at the same time, my little sister was pregnant and apparently I was overshadowing “her time”.

This whole thing is horrible. Just awful. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. I’m guessing your mc has triggered your anxiety and so maybe it would be good to talk to someone about it? It can’t be easy having to deal with that alongside family issues but sometimes it’s better to just block out everyone else and focus on yourself.

I had a horrific natural MC. I was about 10 weeks gone... had the worst contractions in my back and had hand palm size clots coming out of me for 2 days. I actually thought I was going to bleed to death. They don’t know what’s causing the pain and I’ve convinced myself I have severe endometriosis which will mean constant surgeries and I can’t even bear the thought of this one.
Apart from my Husband, I literally have no body. I have some friends but no siblings... nothing.
My Husband has a large, loving family. Loads of friends, great job, HEALTHY! I couldn’t be further from that and I know he would be better off without me. All I do is bring him down and depress him because I’m depressed all the time. I think about suicide everyday- nobody listens to me. I’m screaming out for help but doctors say well it takes months for anti depressants to kick in so don’t see the point. I know if I wasn’t in constant pain I would feel better but I am and that’s that x

Kate. I started feeling better about a week after starting to take antidepressants. I definitely think it was more because I felt like something was happening.

Objectively, I'm in a worse situation than when I started the antidepressants - unemployed, about to start a round of ivf which has up to 33% chance of working - but I haven't been this happy (or horny) for years. I started them mid Feb... I've felt like a new person for the last month and I'm on the lowest possible dose. I can't recommend them enough!!!

Hello OP, we are really sorry to hear you are feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources. You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected].

Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

We are going to move this thread to the Mental Health section shortly.

Problem is also... I’m taking a lot of painkillers everyday and I know that won’t be forever but I worry the effect it’s having on my body...
Adding an antidepressant into the mix might really f* my insides up!
I think I need to get Thursday out the way then decide where to go from there. I’m DEFINITELY going to have some counselling as I have so much to go through from childhood right through to now....
I genuinely feel like I’m cursed, I can’t divulge all on here however your mouths would drop to the floor if you all knew what I’ve been through. I think mentally and now physically I am giving up!!! X

I have it. Lately it’s been so bad that I was crying because I thought I was going to die and soon. My psychiatrist prescribed another medication for me which has if I am honest reduced it. I just get anxious about other things though