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Mental health

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Anyone else with anxiety/depression take everything personally?

4 replies

LelliNelli · 14/04/2018 23:32

As per the title really.
When I'm feeling low I feel like everything is a personal attack on me by life in general (so not by anyone specific).
This includes things like when other people get something (I don't feel this way when they've earned it but rather when they've been given/gifted or won something).
When I'm at a low point things that are in no way personal feel like life has found a way to get me again. This can be things like not being able to make an appointment or having a routine inspection or appraisal at work.
I'm currently in the early stages of councilling (we're currently discussing my childhood but this feeling of "why always me" is something I would like to discuss).
Whenever someone points out to me a positive in my life a switch triggers in my head and I think "yes that's fair maybe it's not so bad" and then I feel guilty for being so negative about everything.
I'm feeling quite lonely at the moment, even though I am close to a few family members and have a good support network because I feel so ungrateful so don't want to discuss it with them, but I was just curious whether this is my personality and I'm a brat or whether it is the depression and if anyone else ever gets like this

OP posts:
WillWorkForFood · 14/04/2018 23:58

I could have written your post and totally recognise how you describe how you feel.

My therapist described my mindset (as a result of the depression and anxiety) as heavily defensive and always scanning for threats.

I've not found the answer yet.

LelliNelli · 15/04/2018 00:13

WillWork mine has said the same. My father was physically and is emotionally abusive and my councillor has said that due to my upbringing I'm constantly in threat awareness mode and always prepared to be hurt and I feel like this may contribute to how I feel.
I'm sorry you feel the same as me but a small part of me is thankful that it's not just me being a selfish cow

OP posts:
WillWorkForFood · 15/04/2018 01:01

It leaves me feeling like I can never relax, be myself and let my hair down - always up tight, always on edge, never content.

mintkat · 15/04/2018 23:47

Me too, and for similar reasons to you. Flowers

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