Down the rabbit hole again

[IrianOfW]

Been on citalopram for many years and everything is hunkydory - depression and anxiety under control, life OK. I have strategies for keeping my mental health in a good place, have learned to control the panic, fight the depression. But over the last 3 years or so I have been hit by one problem after another culminating in a threat of losing my job. I feel so hopeless and scared for the future. For the first time in a decade I can feel myself sinking under the weight of it all. I though I had developed emotional resilience but clearly not. The fear of being afraid is almost worse than anything else.

Hi Irian, I've not been on the MH board much lately but am back on it and saw this thread. I just wanted to say I know how you feel. My MH had been alright for a while but recently I've been feeling terrible - culmination of several stressful years including job loss, moving house, pregnancy and now on mat leave with a 6 month old baby and suspected PND.

Not aiming to usurp your thread here, just wanted to say is it any wonder we are feeling shite considering all that's been happening? Stuff like this would floor people with no previous MH issues. You have a decade of wellness under your belt - that's amazing, and concrete proof that there is a well, happy you to get back to. I think we both need to get to the doctor - I keep putting it off but my medication probably does need adjusted. And perhaps a refresher of therapy to address the issues which are currently upsetting you. I think quite often we believe we are putting our strategies into practice but they can get a bit worn and blunted over time and need sharpening up.

I really hope you feel better soon