depressed, and my wife want to kick me out

[OhDearIgottaProblem]

Name changed for this. I gotta problem. I've been depressed for some time, which in my case means spending hours staring into space, and moping around with a long face. The last two nights I've been googling suicide methods. I forget which philosopher said that only the thought of suicide helped him get through some nights.

My wife of 40+ years says she can't put up with me any more, and if I can't cheer up ... well, she wasn't specific, but her meaning was clear: we can't stay together.

Unfortunately, the local suicide hotline closes at midnight, so basically the hotline closes just as the dark night of the soul kicks in.

I'm not in the UK; it's gonna be a long night.

There's an app called BlueCall (or so I've read) with a help line where you can chat here's a link. If you must Google something, google "Suicide Zero" and figure out how to get engaged with the organization, it is an organization that works with people to prevent suicides. Also think about what is the hen and what is the egg, if you're staring into space for hours that will also cause depression. If you want to change your life situation there are so many other things to try out first, like walking SantiagodeCompostela, the "el camino". I bet you haven't checked out that possibility just yet. You owe it to yourself to try something else first.

Do you know why you are depressed?
Do you know what triggered the mood you are in?

Unfortunately, until you can know the why's, the strategies to help cannot be put into place. And until you know the answers it's a really lonely place.

How is it going for you? (It now being a couple of hours later)

Hello OP, we are really sorry to hear you are feeling this way.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources- we know you're not in the UK, but you may still find some useful information on there.

You can also go to the Samaritans website, or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.

We also like to remind everyone that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

So sorry to hear what your dealing with.your wife will not understand or don't know how to deal with the situation. I've been through similar feeling as I just couldn't deal with the stress. You may or may not know why you are feeling like this but you have seeked some kind of support by posting your issue which means you want it delt with that's a good step seek help from professional and take it from there .Let your wife know how you are feeling if you haven't done already.
When i told my partner he had no idea and was more supportive.
Good luck