I’m becoming a danger to myself and others. What will happen to my kids?

[BarryChuckle]

Since September last year my mental health has been deteriorating and due to an admin cock up I am still waiting to get help.

Over the last week or so I have noticed my mood being increasingly erratic. I can be quite calm one minute and the next, I feel like I have lost of my mind, I start screaming/shouting/crying/throwing things and my DCs are witnessing this (they are 1&2).

I’m also increasingly suicidal and I’m always looking for a way out. I’m scared that I may follow through with these thoughts or may harm my children when I’m having one of my episodes - they feel like an out-of-body-experience in which I’m floating and watching myself behave in a totally crazy and scary manner.

I know I need to contact the crisis team but I’m scared that if I tell them this that I will lose my children.

Does anyone know what’s likely to happen to them?

I have a DP (their DF) and his family are supportive. I find it hard to open up to my side of the family due to their previous behaviour towards me.

You will not be regarded as a failure and your children will not be taken away from you.
You will be regarded very highly for seeking help for the benefit of your children.

You will likely receive extensive support.

The children may temporarily be placed with a family member or elsewhere but this is only a possibility and would be short term.

Thank you for your replies.

If they are placed with a family member, will it be a case of fighting to have them back? The thought of potentially losing them is stopping me seeking help.

If their DF is with you it's unlikely they will remove your children. Most agencies realise removing a mother's children can be a huge negative factor in her recovery and SS only remove them as a very last resort.

The sooner you can get help for your condition(s) the better it will look. You need to have a very in depth discussion with your DP to make sure he is on the same page as you and able to support you all

Hi op how ru?

I'm not sure how childcare works but my dear friends children went to her ex husband i if they can go to their dad or a family member you will be allowed access and then once you are well enough they will review
But have hope it might not come to that xx

OP,

Sorry you are feeling this way BUT your DC must take priority.

The fact you are screaming at them and they are witnessing your emotional outbursts, is not good for them.

You sound like a wonderful Mother.

Do what's best for your children.