You only have one life

[IncognitoSee]

Name changed; I’m struggling today. I don’t know why I tried to explain how/why I was feeling but telling me ‘you only have one life’ doesn’t really help.
I could be wrong, but it feels like someone basically telling you to pull your socks up, ffs.
I wish I could be invisible. I mean, go & collect DC’s and be inside some sort of moveable capsule, so that I didn’t have to see, hear or talk to anyone.

What I mean is, I don’t want to be invisible so that I can eavesdrop or anything, I want to be sealed within something so that no one can see me and I can’t see them.

That’s in the absence of simply ceasing to exist not being an option at the moment.

With sincere apologies to anyone reading who has an incurable illness and would like to live for many years, but may not do.
This must read extremely self pitying to you.
I’m sorry if I’m ungrateful for physical health.

I don't really have anything to say that will help, but you're not alone in feeling like that. When I'm in that place I just sleep. Anything to escape the world and 'not exist' for a while.

I'm sorry you're feeling like that at the minute

Thank you eyes.
It’s good of you to reply.

X

Op I neither have anything helpful to add unfortunately, but I totally understand the feeling of wanting to be invisible when in that same place too, and not wanting to be seen or heard nor have to see or hear anyone else either. You are definately not alone In feeling this way and I sympathise with you completely. Just wish I could give more positive and helpful advice on this matter.

Wishing you well

Thank you summer. I can’t tbink of any time or occasion when I feel happy or content.
I feel ill at ease all of the time. I really just don’t want to be alive but I think it would ruin DC’s lives if I did anything drastic.
I’m struggling to get up out of bed these days.
It’s interesting that you experience the invisible thing too. Do you feel depressed .. ? X

Im feeling similar today op. Life is hard x

Op have sorry if you have spoken to some one already, but have you seen a gp for the feelings you are experiencing. Please don’t struggle with it alone. The feelings of wanted to be dead rare definately depression affecting your brain. I do understand the feeling and the difficulty of having to drag yourself from bed, the most ‘simple’ things become the most hardest.
Yes mines depression too.

Tigress sorry you are feeling this way too.

Is yours coming from circumstances Tigres?
No need to answer, obviously.

Apologies for all my spelling errors I should have previewed first I’m in the middle of switching medications and clumsy with spelling and typing atm.

I feel this way a lot of the time- I have moderate depression. I guess people might think I'm stuck up or weird but when I do interact with people- even in the smallest way- I generally feel better. I'm not usually a sociable person anyway so at least part of that behaviour might be me (albeit hugely intensified). I read that someone needs to be shy, someone needs to listen so I've grabbed on to that. Hope things improve for you ...

X post I should probably do something about it.
I’m over thinking everything - I mean I don’t even want to speak to a anyone if I have to buy something for supper.
Rather just use a machine.

I think that might be part of my problem mammy. I feel very lonely.
I’m shy but it doesn’t mean you never want to talk to anyone, ever.

I can’t work out Relationships. I don’t mean romantic relationships, I mean anywhere where there’s a group of more than say 4 people.
I never seem to ‘fit in’.

I’m feeling similar today. A life limiting diagnosis for my mum has hit me hard and the risk for my own limit is getting to me. That’s doesn’t actually make it easier to pull my socks up and want to stop hiding. And this is no doubt mild by comparison to many people.

Really struggling to work and to focus on my hobbies. I know what my fixes are: time with just one friend, who requires no effort from me; gardening; yoga; better sleep. But actually taking that step to get there is against me today.

Thanks Summer

Yes I have a few conditions I struggle to deal with and I've had enough of them. But feeling is same. Think I'd have depression even without my conditions to be honest as I felt very mildly this way before them.

Have a dc and wouldn't want to impact their life like that. But it's hard getting through the days.

Thoughts go out to you and anyone else struggling. So hard.

It does always help to do something enjoyable or interact with somebody (I'm not social but havd family to talk to) but it's actually finding the strength to make that push that can be the hardest.