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Feelings of regret and failure - every choice feels wrong

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NordicNobody · 22/02/2018 22:06

I've had to make a few choices over the last few years which felt like every option was wrong, and even making the "best" choice has still left me with huge feelings of regret/ "what ifs" etc. Most recently I withdrew from medical school (for a variety of complicated personal reasons) - I still think it was the right choice, and yet I simultaneously regret it and feel like a total failure. It's not even really that I'm desperate to be a doctor - if you gave me a chance to start med school over I'm not sure I'd take it. But I still feel like a failure, like I'll never amount to anything now. One of the reason's I withdrew is that I felt it was the best choice for my son's well being, I felt like by staying I was failing as a parent - but now a few years on I feel like I've failed as a role model instead! And every choice I consider for moving forward now comes with a multitude of doubt and a running commentary that says "whats the point? You already reached high for something and failed. You sacrificed so many things and it was all for nothing." I feel discontent with every situation I'm in, but as soon as I change it I look back with rose tinted glasses and feel regret. For example we moved abroad last year and I was very eager to make the move, but now I feel frustrated and unhappy here and just want to move back. I'm bored and lonely so often as a SAHM but I'm sure as soon as I go back to work I'll start regretting not making more of my son while he's young. I feel like I can't win, like my brain's out to get me whatever I do. How do I change this disordered thinking and accept reality as it is without living in the past or being afraid to make decisions?

OP posts:
JamPasty · 22/02/2018 22:09

Have a look at MoodGym (moodgym.com.au/) - it's all about recognising and addressing disordered thinking. Requires a 20 quid subscription per year. At least you recognise what you're doing - that's half the battle in addressing it I reckon!

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