Anyone have specific anxiety about using the telephone?

[WaxOnFeckOff]

This is becoming an issue for me. I'm in my 50s and it's probably always been simmering underneath, i'm suddenly finding it's impacting on me.

I'm fine with answering a call, but i'm struggling to make them. Even for stupid stuff like making a hair appointment or booking a table for a meal. A friend called me today about a meet up this weekend and at the end of the call we both went off to look at some menus and I was meant to call her back and I couldn't. I ended up texting with the excuse that I thought she might be eating dinner.

So, nothing huge so far, however last week a senior member of staff asked me (by email) to give someone a call, it wasn't a particularly awkward call to make. I didn't want to do it so basically emailed back and said I didn't think it was a good idea, it may have come across snippy.....my boss (who was copied in) replied that he'd call the person. Then I felt like an idiot. Now I'm feeling very anxious about going back into work but I think I'll need to apologise. I can't call though so I'll need to do an email of some sort.

I've never been this bad before, I find myself picking things to do or places to go that I can book on-line.

When I am there I am fine (e.g. at hairdressers and all chatty and then I pay and she asks if I want to make another appointment and i say no, i'll just call you and then I put it off over and over again) and I know it all sounds really trivial and no-one who knows me would ever think that I feel like this, I come across very competent and confident. I just feel that I am at the top of a very slippy slope.

Oh yes to rehearsing - if I do have to make a call I practise in my mind whatever i need to say, even if it’s something mundane like making an appointment.

What are we all like!?!?

So, are we mostly all just keeping this to ourselves or are you all fairly open about it?

I hate making phone calls, DH makes all appointments and bookings for me!! Strangley I can answer the phone no problem, and am not too bad when making calls at work.

I am fairly confident, friendly and self assured in life so it really suprises those who know about it!

I do most of the household organising simply because of the hours and type of job DH has (he's not really contactable).

He tells me he's never met anyone on earth that comes anywhere close to me - I don't think I can burst his bubble and admit to a flaw...:o

Funny that rOsie I can remember telling a colleague once that I didn't like joining motorways from the slip road and her jaw dropped as she expected that I was confident about everything. I then told her that i didn't like heights, enclosed spaces, fairgrounds, going underwater, slides etc etc. I'm just the opposite of an adrenaline junkie.

I haven't sorted out the help I need for my anxiety as I'm too anxious to phone. I emailed but they won't discuss my issues like that.
I had someone offer to do me a huge favour. I can't face phoning them so I haven't taken them up on it.

That's crap wolfie :(

I keep it to myself
Except DH - he knows that I hate the phone and that he has to phone the takeaway/taxi/book things if needed!
Mostly I just ‘miss calls’ and then text/email people later instead. To be fair my friends don’t really ring me so I think maybe they’ve figured it out

I hate hate hate using the phone. Online takeaway ordering is in my view one of the greatest inventions of the 21st century.

When I was younger I just used to not do stuff I really wanted to do if it involved a phone call at any point. Gradually I talked myself into it, and then broke the back of the anxiety by spending 3 months doing a telesales job (!) because it was all I could get and I was living out of my overdraft.

Now I work in sales and make around 80-100 phone calls a week. I still hate doing it but I know I can do it and it won't kill me. I do find it helps to be essentially making the same phone calls a lot of the time so I know what I need to say and can predict most responses. If I know it's not going to be one of those calls I write a list of bullet points before I call so that I don't panic. It seems to work.

Having said that, if I need to speak to someone who I know has a difficult accent (or my accent is difficult for them!) or the signal is bad and I'm worried I won't be able to hear them properly...I email.

I am indeed crap Wax!

I used to love the phone, but the older I have got the less I like using it. I find the flow of conversation, esp with digital phones, is not smooth and I constantly feel I am interrupting someone if I start to speak. I also hate phoning someone up as I worry I am interrupting them.

Sadly, both my daughters have the same issue. One had cbt to try and help.

You're not crap wolfie I meant the situation is!

Ha I know what you meant. But I am a bit crap really. I could do it but I don't feel up to doing so! Rubbish.

I am a phone dodger too. Kind of pleased there are so many of us.