Single mother with mental health issues

[Mumshelp12]

Does anyone have any experience over custody battles with fathers over my own mental health? And what was the outcome? I'm currently waiting on assessment for bipolar disorder my children's fathers have taken their kids and gained temporary residence whiteout my knowledge my kids have never been at risk my 'outbursts' are usually directed at the father of my youngest who was very violent and abusive throughout our relationship that ended 2 years ago. Am I going to lose my kids to them on my mental health alone? Any advice welcomed

I'm sorry you're going through this. Are you sure you have mental health issues? I only ask as I've been led to believe for years I had every mental health problem under the sun. Even took medication that completely messed with my head. Turns out it was the abuse from my partner that was the actual problem, nothing wrong with my mental health!

Thankyou for replying I do think the abuse plays a massive role in the way i feel but even before my children my family and friends describe me as very erratic irrational and up and down is the only way to describe it I can't just feel sad or happy I'm hysterically sobbing and convinced I'm not good enough for my kids or full of confidence bouncing around like I have no cares in the world, I've found very little support anywhere for mums in my situation awaiting assessments and being deemed an unfit mother in the process I've asked for help from everyone and nobody has really done anything until it's gotten this bad that my children have had to go to their dads cos I'm not in control emotionally at the minute. Did you find any useful support and if you don't mind me asking what was the outcome of your situation? The abuse from youngest father has definitely traumatised me I would say along with post natal depression after the birth of my son who is now 4 the abuse contributed and although I have a grip on everyday life and sometimes life's going really good I am in the process of applying for university good family and friend support but I still feel hopeless and not good enough to be their mother I love them and want what's best and only in those moments of pure despair I feel incapable

To be honest I'm getting my ducks in a row ready to get him out of my life at the moment! Not sure how to link but if you look at my previous posts you can see where I'm up to!
I never normally post, I'm a lurker but your post struck a chord with me.
Please don't write yourself off just yet....and do not underestimate what abuse can do to your mental health. I've had bipolar, depression with OCD, "manic episodes", hypomanic episodes....I know now 100% that my mental health issues are not the problem, he is.
You may be suffering PTSD too.
Mental health issues alone should not go against you re. Custody but you really do need to seek advice. Accept every bit of help that gets offered and more importantly you need to be completely honest about everything. You have nothing to lose by doing so and everything to gain.
This is one of those awful situations where the abuser has everything handed to him on a plate. It's time to try and get strong and fight.
When are you due an assessment? Are you currently taking any medication?
Have you much support in real life? X

Also, I too have always been described as a "drama queen" as far as emotions go but these men bring out the worst in us.
Life with them is so up and down that it's no wonder your moods go up and down too! That's perfectly normal for anybody in that situation.
I'd see the psych and be totally honest. I'd convinced myself so much that I was mental unwell, desperate for a reason as to why I felt that way.
It's only in the last 2 weeks that the penny dropped.
Unfortunately as he has the children, everything will be geared up to ensuring they're all right until they know what's going on with you. Is their dad allowing you to see them at least?

For the past year and a half me and my sons dads relationship has improved and in honesty he doesn't do anything to me now I am very caught up on what went on and I do struggle with it massively while he claims innocence as I'm sure u can imagine he's very manipulative and has talked his way out of even biting my face and played the victim and got offered domestic violence support!! I have asked for help 12 weeks ago and I am still waiting for assesment PTSD could be something to mention I will remember that, my kids got placed with their fathers Tuesday morning after a sly trip to court they told the judge they'd let me know! There are two different fathers my daughters dad was bringing her back home Monday with no problems til he spoke to my sons dad and opinions soon changed, I've worked with mast and social workers in the past who have good reports and zero concerns over the children. My doctor seems to have written me off with depression and prescribed anti depressants which have progressively made the situation worse across 5 weeks, I am doing everything I can to get better I asked for help when I needed it and they've used it as an opportunity to remove my poor kids I'm allowed a few hours a week I've seen a solicitor today we are going back to court next week to ask for the order of residency to be varied and include some time at home with me as I'm not and never have been an immediate risk to my kids I understand what they have done as Tjey were concerned for their children but I've been called crazy disgusting my kids hate me they're not happy etc which school and professionals and anyone who bloody knows them know they are very happy and very well looked after. I am holding my hands up and admitting my faults and asking for help and I feel like I'm being punished for doing so 😫 I'm terrified a judge will rule in their favour I'ts so relieving to know I'm not on my own I feel like I'm insane at the minute

You see I find it strange. These men don't just improve like that. More likely you're that beaten down that he has no need to exert his authority. He already has it.
From what you've said there's no way they will take your kids from you permanently and I'd like to think once the facts come out in court the judge will see straight through him.
I'm just a little confused, are you still living with one of your children's dads? Or are you separate from both men? Did you suffer abuse from both?
I would try not to worry too much yet, use this time to work on yourself.
A decent father wouldn't have sneakily gone to court he just wouldn't

Just so you know you've done all the right things so try and not be hard on yourself.
I would contact women's aid though for a chat and see what they think x

THat is very true! He doesn't have to do anything cos he has control he knows how to get the exact reaction he neees to benefit him at the time
I'm glad you don't think so rational me is sure I will get them back but their making out I've killed someone when I've just asked for help 🙄 I am seperated from both dads yeah my daughters dad wasn't abusive but is neing verbally absuive when I'm trying to make contact with my daughter and isn't taking her to school in the meantime which is obviously not what's best for her.
Thankyou for your help I really do appreciate it I never post on her ejust read through but needed to get it out to someone who's not a part of it I think I will try women's aid and continue to keep looking for the support and help I need to get them back xx

Yeah they both sound pretty awful tbh I honestly do not believe the problem is all you. By all means still go for assessments. Just go with an open mind though and try not to self diagnose as you start to believe what you think you are! Honestly now I've just accepted that I'm just a tad emotional and sensitive....that's a personality trait not a mental health illness!
I'm confident your children will be back home soon. In the meantime try and see this for what it is, two pathetic men rubbing their hands together in glee that they can control you through the law. Just carry on being honest, you've done nothing wrong. Take the moral high ground you are doing what's best for your kids, they are not and the judge should see that. They certainly will not be the first abusive men to do it.
You need to really focus on yourself right now, believe in yourself you sound like a brilliant Mum xx