Please help - anxiety

[mumof2sarah]

I think I just need a hand hold. For the first time In a while my anxiety had gone completely through the roof. I'm shaking, breathless, feel sick, I'm on edge, exhausted but can't sleep, I feel close to bursting into tears, keep sitting outside my DCs rooms and just listening. I don't know what's caused it or why it's suddenly bothering me, I feel so so close to a full blown attack that not even meditation is helping tonight. My mind is doing overtime thinking about family, friends (doubting myself as a good friend), life in general and it's just not shutting down to rest. I just don't know what to do at all

Hi, I’m sorry to hear this. Do you have a partner in the house that can give you a good cuddle and a chat or someone to phone. Take some deep breaths and think about something that has made you happy eg having your son and how happy you were. Sorry I’m not too much help but hope you’re ok.

(Sorry I thought you said DS but you said DC so could be a daughter)

DP is already asleep as he's working at 4am, he's been a star with cuddles etc and told me to wake him if I need to but I don't feel right waking him when he works so hard. My two DDs are both fast asleep but having them near does help calm me slightly. I snuck in to the youngests room and pinched one of the many trillion teddies (yes I am grown up) to see if that calms me but I can't get calm at all x

Go downstairs and put a film on, stand in the middle of the room and jog on the spot for as long as you can.

Tomorrow go make an appointment with the gp and ask for some beta blockers or other meds to get rid of the excess adrenaline

@gamerchick thankyou, I wish I could jog on the spot but I have a condition which means that would unfortunately make me worse with my health. I feel like I'm falling apart, not just through anxiety tonight but at the seams too

I’m sorry you’re going through this. I know how hard it is.

I spent many restless nights awake because I could not shut down and was feeling overwhelmed. What helped me was writing it down. Even if it was just on my iPhone. I wrote everything that was on my mind and while writing I went through some kind of change. I went from writing „I can’t do this, I’m so scared, anxious etc” to “Right. I will do this. I’m strong and I will get through whatever is bothering me.” Maybe write an action plan, for example steps you could take to help yourself. Or just write your worries down.

I once read in a book by Dale Carnegie that you should first state your worry. Then write down the worst consequences that could happen if your worries became true. Next list solutions to these consequences (or simply if so and so happens, I will do this and that). It helped me feel prepared even if my worries were irrational. And I was able to put the notes away and become more calm.

I know this might not work for everyone and not every time. But I thought I would share this with you. You’re not alone

@Reike thankyou, that's actually something I used to do when I was bad at one point, I had a little blog and Instagram account (not for anyone else just me) and I'd totally forgot. Just putting it out there did help me slightly.

I think a big thing for me ATM is the hot flushes and the (TMI) weeing as soon as manage to find a comfy position and start my breathing exercises I start having hot flushes, even if I'm in shorts and vest top and on top of blankets and need to bloody wee all the time. I always had those symptoms when it's been playing up and I think those make it even worse because I can never stay settled thanks to them

Evening Sarah!
I'm in exactly the same position - I've literally just been in to check on both my DC to try to calm myself down.
One of them has a very very very slight cough but because I have ridiculous health anxiety I can't sleep until I've had at least 20 minutes of no noise from him - he has had croup three times in the past year. It is not even remotely a Croupy cough.
The other one had her light on, she is fast asleep but I had to stay and watch her breathe for a good two minutes.
I also have ongoing chest pain which is almost definitely because I haven't taken my asthma inhaler for over a week but because it's nighttime I have decided I probably have pneumonia so have checked my temp three times this evening (it's normal) and my pulse pretty much ever half hour (also normal) - I had pneumonia twice in 2016 anf the pain is right there in my lung - but I know I also get pain when I have forgotten to take my inhaler or when I get a migraine attack.
When you see it written down It sounds barking but at the moment im panicking and can't get scary thoughts out of my head. I'm already planning what we would do if DS has croup and if I have pneumonia and how we would cope running our business.
I could sleep of course but I've just been downstairs to get my inhaler and DH has left the dishwasher on which might catch fire while we are asleep so I've had to check the smoke alarms are flashing.
....and some people think that anxiety is all in your head 😳
I'm on rescue remedy, herbal sleeping pulls, green tea and Mumsnet - one of those has to work...

Now I'm also worried I've overshared and killed your thread....
Hope you are attempting sleep.

Omg @WutheringFrights are you me? We could be the same person, apart from the fact I've take my inhalers because if I don't I have an attack almost immediately (chronic asthmatic). Even down to the pneumonia, I got it twice in 2017 it's bloody awful. Am the same with the kids too. I hope you're ok, ive tried so many things it's unreal. I'm finally starting to get to the 'yawn that's so deep it feels like it takes your full breath' and eyes drooping but I've had a headache all day so took some extra strong paracetemol (only 1 and a half as I also have a fear of medications and worry about dosages 🙈) so I know (hope but positivity) that I'll be asleep soon and get two hours out of them. It's the most awful feeling in the world to me. My eldest (13) just got up to use the bathroom and I was pacing outside the bathroom when she came out because I was worried with her being up at this time "yeah mum I just needed a wee" with an eye roll as she came past. Sending you positive relaxation vibes lovely xxx

I know the feeling, too scared to go out apart from shops, which also scare me and the news so scary, cannot sleep either. Try feet on floor and grounding and long deep breaths, scrunch & tense body as well. I don’t like anyone coming close to me as think they will do something to me. Hope feel better soon.

@Anyhope I get the floor thing. It's strange when I'm at my worst I tend to sit on the floor with my knees bent or even lie on it. I'm guessing it's the grounded thing. I would try sleeping on the floor now but my chest isn't at it's best right now and it'll make it worse.

Woah that is freaky!
Were you anxious before your pneumonia?
I've realised recently that I've always been inclined to panic about stuff but since I've been ill everything is an instant and utter disaster.
Ive has a migraine today as well which doesn't help becuase I can't think straight.
Came to bed at 8pm utterly exhausted but had to do some work accounts so that I didn't go to bed worrying about those.
Four hours later I am still awake - DH is knackered and fast asleep - bless his heart he is so patient with me getting in and out of bed!
I get a little pat everytime I get back into bed.
....and then feel guilty that I'm disturbing him and he won't get enough sleep and will be tired tomorrow and crash his van when he's out on deliveries.....
Perfectly normal behaviour.... The sleeping pills are quite obviously not working....yet.....

@WutheringFrights I've suffered anxiety and depression on and off for years but I do find it resurfaces/gets worse around time of the month or when I've been poorly. I've got another 2 medical 'things' on top of my asthma and then all that, so when ever I have any of them playing up my anxiety can become unbearable. DP is just getting over the Aussie flu and dr thinks I may be starting with it which would explain some of it. I'm currently sat at the bottom of my DDs bed as I feel like I'll calm better and faster here maybe x

**DPS are the exact same too. He would have stayed awake all night with me if he was t so tired. He'll have a little moan tomorrow about the fact I should have woke him to help in some way bless him x

We've just bought a totally luxurious duvet becuase I felt I need a really heavy duvet to make me feel calm and snuggled in. It's like an actual security blanket.

Tonight it's bloody suffocating me!

I think I am going to put my phone down and try to sleep.....
I reckon I'll be back here in twenty minutes

Just breathe deeply and listen to your DD breathing nothing else - but get comfy as you are not going to sleep sitting up!

Thanks everyone in the end I've managed maybe 2 hours. I feel like a walking zombie but there's nothing I can do now. I'm going to sort my DCs for school and then try and visit a Dr.

Can I ask if anyone's ever used a weighted blanket (@WutheringFrights does it usually work for you?) I read something in the night about it, can't find it now but just wondering if it helps anyone?x

Hope you're all ok tonight. I've had a very similar day to how I felt yesterday evening resulting in lots of tears but I do feel slightly more settled tonight so I'm just getting in bed and I'm going to do some meditation x

Hi I saw the word anxiety and was drawn in. I have suffered with anxiety in the past and found counselling and exercise ( intense long distance running) really helped. Now have twins and have time for neither of these. Post natal my anxiety went into overdrive. Have been put on a low dose of citalopram and it's worked absolute miracles for me. May be worth a try. Sending you hugs x I know how it feels xxx

I normally love my heavy duvet but last night it just felt too much. I'm looking forward to going to bed tonight.
Hoping that tonight will be better - I'm just watching death in paradise and planning on a bath but I already feel fizzy inside which isn't a great start.
Hope the meditation works.