Can it work with my BPD girlfriend?

[user1482177776]

Is it possible to have a long term relationship with a partner with BPD?

I love my girlfriend but I've grown to despise the part of her with borderline personality disorder. We've been together for 3 years and had some amazing times but the bad is starting outweigh the good.

On Friday we had another argument over nothing which escalated to her calling me fat, ugly and trashing the inside of my car. I now completely distance myself from her emotionally and that disconnection is seeping into our good times.

I have BPD. Been married five years and together for eight.

So it can work.

But your gf sounds abusive, and that’s not because of her BPD.

Her bpd doesn't mean she is allowed to be abusive to you. Yes a relationship can work but only when both partners work hard to be respectful. Is she getting any professional support? It'll be very very hard for her when she is triggered but she needs to learn to manage it in a way that doesn't hurt you.

I have BPD too, but the condition itself is not an excuse to be abusive .

Is she currently in psychotherapy or on any medication?

Have you posted about this before? This seems really familiar.

Trashing your car and calling you names doesn’t sound like a very healthy, happy relationship.

i have bpd , ive been with my partner 22 years .(ive never trashed anything or personally insulted anyone )
maybe shes just not a nice person and the bpd is irrelevant .