Nothing I will do from now on is going to matter. My life is a whole is a mess. I wish I could end my life. Put a stop to my stupidity once and for all. String of failed relationships, and I am at fault. I never cheated, I was just all wrong. The amount of times I have gathered myself up after each failed relationship. I honestly cannot see a way forward and feel like such a failure. he made it clear I was in the wrong. I have been through counselling, been to see the GP, told the doctor I felt suicidal yet no help. I am tired. I am disappointed and I have no more left in me to fight and carry on. My whole adult life has been shit. I am numb and I am looking for a way out. It’s too painful and too late to carry on. I am an embarrassment and a disappointment. I am very much alone and I have been strong on my own too long now. I can’t do this anymore