Feel like I have some mental health issues and don’t know what to do

[misslomi]

Not really sure where to start with this. I’ve never really had any mental health problems in the past but over these last few months I’ve started to feel very very stressed which is getting me down and can make me quite angry.

I run a business along with my parents and things aren’t going well at all which makes day to day life extremely stressful. Work is very full on, I have weekends off but there’s just no break from it at the moment. I really struggle to switch off at the weekends and in the evenings as my phone is always going off with work related messages.

I haven’t had any annual leave since March, I’m feeling so tired and run down, I’ve been getting really bad mouth ulcers and now just started getting headaches too. My parents don’t seem to understand and think that I should just be able to keep going without a break. I know if I have a week off just to spend at home my parents won’t let me be and will still expect me to do bits and bobs if they need doing, even though I know I can get everything covered for me.

On top of work stress I’m also learning to drive. I really don’t enjoy it at all. I get so nervous before my lessons that I just want to cry. I’m not sure wether to carry on with lessons or just give up. I’m not sure it’s worth feeling miserable about it.

All of this is really getting on top of me, I’ve had a few nights in the last two months where I’ve broken down and cried after a bad day. The last couple of weeks I’ve been drinking more and I don’t want to get into the habit of drinking to try and forget all the stuff that stresses me out.

I’ve got a lovely DP but he’s not great with this sort of thing and he doesn’t really know how to handle me at the moment.

I’m not sure what to do now. I don’t know whether to go and see my GP or if it’s just something I should deal with and hope after I have some time off that I’ll feel better. Has anyone been through anything like this before?

Thank you so much for reading

Big big hugs OP.

I have been through this kind of stress but it sounds like you have it much worse because the business is with your parents and for us it's just me and DP.

If I was you (and I'm not, dealing with this stuff is really personal so it's important to do what feels right for you) I would:

• tell your parents you need a better work life balance for your health and that you won't be dealing with work related calls/emails/whatever outside certain hours unless it's an emergency (giving myself permission to respond to an enquiry sent on a Saturday on Monday morning was extremely liberating).
• make a top 10 list of things that are bugging you the most (from bringing your books up to date to setting a clock to the right time that's been annoying you, anything) and try to do 15 minutes a day on the list, but don't beat yourself up if you don't manage it, try again tomorrow
• if you don't NEED to learn to drive right now just put it on pause and come back to it when you're in a better frame of mind - this isn't giving up, it's being smart
• try and go for a little walk each day just you and your thoughts, things often seem better after a think in the fresh air with a little exercise
• 100% talk to your GP, in my area (east Cheshire) there's a charity called "talking therapies" that the GP told me about and I was able to self-refer
• make sure you're drinking enough water and taking your vitamins
• even if your DP isn't great at giving advice make sure he knows how you are feeling

Thank you so much for replying, I really appreciate your advice. I think I will go and see my GP, it’s just quite intimidating as I’ve never had to speak to them about anything like this before. Not sure I’d know where to start to be honest!

Talking to my parents isn’t the easiest but I’ll give it a go!

You can do this @misslomi
I know how scary it is but once you've said "the words" to your GP you'll feel good just for taking a step on the path to getting yourself sorted. Can you see any GP at your practice? Ours has a website listing the doctors and their specialities, of which one is mental health for one of them. But it will be such a common thing for all GPs to deal with, what's most important is that you just go and see what help they can offer. Ask if there are any talking therapies too.
And re. your parents, try your best to politely inform them of whatever you decide is best rather than asking permission.
You've got this
Let us know how you get on