I don't know what else to do.

[YoureNoFuckingElvis]

So many previous posts. Disclaimer; no children.

I keep coming back to this. I have had enough of being myself. I'm on medication, I've tried therapy, I am literally at the end of the NHS' resources.

I have crippling agoraphobia; I can't leave the house alone. I can't use the phone. I can't fucking exist. My life is just one series of "I can't".

I am so sick of being this half person. I don't do anything. I just get through each day because "That's what people do!" But really, is there a point to it?

I self harm daily just to exist. OCD is out of control in that I just give in to compulsions daily. I don't do anything else.There isn't the option to do anything else.

I have had enough and I've exhausted all the resources for help. What else is there?

There is always something even if we can't see it at the time. Keep on going.

When you manage to leave the house who are you with?

If I go anywhere, its with my mum. I'm 31 years old, ffs. It is absolutely pathetic and there's no reason to make anyone else go along with it.

Thank you, for saying anything to me. I'm genuinely not worth anyone bothering about and I'm not even sure why I made this thread. Tonight is incredibly dark, I guess.

OP everyone is worth it! I’m in a black place at the moment too but I know it will pass! Hope you soon feel better.

I hope things improve for you soon, Kittens. Take care of yourself

Mums are great regardless of your age. I am 6 years older than you and have had a shitty few years too. There are better days and days when I feel like I'm swimming in treacle.

It's ok op. Our lives don't have to be perfect. Would having a pet help? Something to care for and invest time and love into?

This is a great resource- www.relationshipanarchy.com/mental-emotional-wellness/everything-is-awful/ Sometimes it has helped to run through this checklist. Hope that it helps.

I have a pet, she's literally the reason I get up every morning. I know that she'd be taken care of though. Anyone else would do a better job for her, I'm just a food conduit for her.

Thank you, all.

MrsNai, I've been through that checklist. There are things I can't do; solely because I don't have people around me. It's a very valuable link and I hope that other people read it and take stock.

I'm not a real person so I don't think that my opinion matters all that much.