Hi feathers :-)
I've just joined so I can throw anything I have that may help you while waiting! This is what I do for a living but I also have deep personal experience within this area (I'm sure we all do to greater or lesser extents!).
I'd really like to help you & believe I can certainly give you some pointers, tips and direction. Everybody's 'journey' is different and what works well for one may need tweaking for another, so don't give up on techniques if it's not helpful first time.
I think it'll be easier if I list some things below with (hopefully) brief explanations.
- Meditation.. we all now know a lot more about this. Clinical trials, studies and brain imaging shows how it effects our brain and nervous system. Most of us are overstimulated by constant attention grabbing 'things' (news, tv, smart phones, social media/internet etc etc).. This has an impact on our hormones, the low level concerns or stress that we are constantly exposed to is quite unhealthy for our bodies & minds (it also effects our thoughts and thinking, literally) and the antidote for this is meditation and mindfulness. There are lots of different types of meditation and they will all achieve the same aim, however, with a busy overactive mind, I suggest transcendental meditation (or using a mantra).. this offers you a singular comfortable word, which can be as simple as saying "peace" over & over in your mind. What this does for a busy mind is it forces focus onto a single point/word that you can find any rhythm you like with, it can be with your breath, you can say it long and slowly, or over & over - whichever you prefer at the time. ( as you relax more, the mantra often becomes very slow, drawn out and in alignment with your breathing, BUT, you don't need to chase that.. there can be times when the mind is really busy and the mantra is better faster until the thinking settles down.)
As you meditate this way, when you notice your mind has wandered off to chores or imaginings or random thoughts, that's fine, just notice it and come back to the mantra. Always come back to the mantra.
If you do this for 20mins twice a day, it has an extraordinary effect on ones life and clarity. It doesn't need to be complicated & to get started, you can try using headphones with rainforest sounds, or anything that YOU find soothing and a quiet 'background' sound.. this can be very helpful to begin to turn it into a habit.. you'll find after a while, you can do it anywhere. Go into the meditation gently and come out gently.. what I mean is sit comfortably somewhere you won't be disturbed for 20mins, close your eyes, let your breathing settle & become comfy, then start your mantra in your mind (not out loud).. when you want to emerge, stop the mantra but keep your eyes closed a few minutes just to gently come back to eye opened wakefulness.. and yes, there's a reason this is important.. you're affecting biochemistry in there while meditating so if you suddenly jump up and dash off, it can upset you or give you a headache.. it's nothing serious and will all be fine, but let's just be good to ourselves as much as possible. :-)
- Remember that we are not living in the past or the future.. our reality is right here and now, moments are just happening and a lot of our fears and anxieties are born of imaginings, that is to say, things that are not necessarily happening right now. Does your overthinking lay in your future? Are you thinking too much about what might happen if 'this' happens, or will I be ok if something occurs etc..? If a lot of your thought are projections to the future, then you're adopting a common human thinking error called 'fortune telling' (assuming the outcomes of events yet to occur) or 'catastrophising' (assuming an awful or negative outcome of something either present in your life, or something that's not yet happened).
- You will learn all about common thinking errors when you get your appointments, these help us to play devils advocate with ourselves. If you're fearful, stressed or anxious with your thoughts, challenge them! Are they 100% accurate? What might someone else's perspective be? Can you imagine what the 'positive' version of that thought might sound like? For example, (a generic example here!) if I thought; 'my friend didn't call me back when she said she would.. I didn't do anything wrong & I wonder why she's ignoring me?'.. that thought left unchecked could cause hurt, anger or even the estrangement of a friendship.. usually, unnecessarily.
- You might then challenge yourself by saying, maybe something happened and she's caught up in her own goings on? Maybe she didn't realise I was expecting a return call at a specific time, could it have been a turn of phrase.. for example, "speak later"?
- A way of trying to hear this example thought in a positive light might be.. 'I hope my friends ok as she didn't call back.. maybe I'll send her a text just to let her know I'm thinking of her and I'm here if she needs me & when she's free..'
- by altering the quality of that thought you don't feel as hard done by or fearful that something might be wrong with you and you make uninvasive contact to reach out in case the friend really is busy or poorly or a million other things that we all can get caught up in!
Thats just a base example, but when you begin to challenge the QUALITY of your thinking, you really start to get to the nitty gritty of your thinking habits, which ones are good for you and which ones aren't.. and that really is a huge part of all of our mind health, you don't have to say things out loud necessarily but you will benefit hugely from 'un-holes barred' self honesty.. YOU begin to challenge yourself and shelve the ego more often.
We all have ego, but we certainly don't want it in the driving seat! As it's unruly, proud, fretful, boastful, rash and judgemental, among other things! It can have its place, but as a 3rd cousin twice removed is better! :-)
I knew this was going to be long, my apologies!! I certainly have a lot more tools, tricks and tips but I don't want to swamp this thread!! (although I think that horse has bolted! Lol)
I know it sounds too simplistic, but I promise you, creating a meditation habit rewires our brains and if you'd like some good intel, just google 'meditation studies', ted talks meditation, neurology and meditation, brain scans before and after meditation etc.. these should be very inspiring for you as it shows clinical evidence to the changes in brain activity, brain chemistry and brain waves.... all of which equal the human experience.
If you begin this every day before your CBT appointments, it will fast track you!! I've seen it with my own clients and associates and I've experienced it myself..
Meditation is a habit.. so, like many habits to begin with, you make some effort.. after a while it'll be effortless and you will know & experience improvements in many areas of your life.... and that's when we start skipping days (this is something I do), because life's so much better, so much more clarity and energy and peace of mind that you can begin to take for granted that this is just how it is now, and often this is where people break the habit of meditation.. no need to fret or beat ourselves up over this, just hop back on it as soon as you realise.
Also, I just want to add here (as I am able to relate to your specific issue of over thinking and analysing), if you google 'meditation' you'll get swamped in results stating 'this' is the best way or that's the wrong way etc.. which will only lead to procrastination in trying to find the 'best' solution....
It is genuinely as simple as I describe above.. you can even just focus on your breath and as you relax into your own breathing try to notice where you feel it most, at your nostrils? Stomach? Chest? Wherever it is, lock on to it and as you let go just allow relaxation and focus on breathing.. this will have the same results..
I just find a mantra helpful along with the breathing as I too had/have to train/tame a very busy mind..
This is the core.. when you give your focus to the chatter, we cannot help but engage with it, elaborate on it, add to it etc.. if you turn your ATTENTION away from the galloping mind, it cannot remain in gallop.. I'm adding a link to a gentle clip that basically states what I mean by this with some golden wisdom that we will all benefit from. :-)
I hope something in here is helpful. I've been more broad as I've not been able to hear and chat with you about the nature of your specific concerns.. but regardless of what they are, the above will effect change and help you when you find your groove :-)
I'll finish with this..
Overthinking has not ruined your life as whatever has come before is teaching you and crafting you, there will always be both good & bad but what determines the quality of our time is how quickly we learn to cope, accept or turn around the difficult times.. what is yet to come can be determined by you, by your awareness and what you ALLOW your focus to hone in on.... You don't need to beat it.. just let go, learn how to say 'f**k it' a little more and realise that, your/our natural state is far more balanced than we are used to. A lot of us just need to get out of our own way. Meditation as a starting point will teach you to trust yourself, which often blows overthinking out of the water because when we can trust ourselves, we can know our direction on something very quickly and intuitively.. and be kind to yourself. Again, it seems simplistic, but this very common thing seriously impacts the quality of our lives.
CBT is a fantastically useful tool.
I wish you the best of luck! X